Magical Chemical 3 Point 8
by Silver Sniper
Summary: After drinking a newly brewed Inui Juice containing the Magical Chemical 3.8, Fuji finds himself 'magically' turned into a girl for a week. How does she deal with a week of doom, horror, blackmailing, and a lot of dates? One word: CHAOS.
1. Magical Chemical 3 Point 8

**Prince of Tennis © ****Takeshi Konomi **

Don't know if this has been done. Someone tell me if it has, and if you want, I'll tear this down. Yay…

**Note: Fuji will probably be very out of character for some parts of this fic due to uh, his 'condition'. I hope you all understand. There will also probably be no serious romance in this fic, and I usually update between one to two weeks, usually.

* * *

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Chapter One: Magical Chemical 3.8

* * *

It was a rainy day, and for once, Inui was bored out of his mind. He had already updated his data on just about everyone, reviewed his data on just about everyone, and well, anything that has to do data on everyone, if that even makes any sense… The point was, Inui was bored, and…

Just then the most obvious and the greatest idea hit Inui. What better way to spend time inside on a rainy day than to make a new addition to the Inui juice family? None, you could say.

"But what special chemical should I use today?" Inui wondered out loud, an evil grin splashed on his face. A glint of a test tube caught the corner of his eye. "But of course…"

Inui had no idea what it was he had found that day. He had been digging threw a random person's trashcan, searching for other ingredients to his juices when he suddenly stumbled upon it. It was a light blue liquid in a rather dirty vile with a faded label that indicated something in a language not even Inui could understand. The only thing he could make out was the small letters on the bottom that spelt 'magical chemical 3.8' 'effects lasts for a one week' and 'edible'. So that's how the vile came to the possession of Inui. I mean, after all, if it were edible, why not throw it in there?

"I have a good feeling about this one," Inui laughed maliciously as sparks and rings of fumes emitted from his juice. "I'll call it… Magical Inui Juice Remix Deluxe 3.8, Limited Edition Golden Version." (Whatever that means…)

* * *

"Nya! Fuji, hurry up!" Eiji wailed to his classmate, who just smiled and continued at the same pace. "We're going to be late, and Tezuka's probably going to make us run a hundred laps or something!"

"Eiji, calm down, we'll make it in time," Fuji said in a calm manner, the total opposite of his fretting teammate.

"Nya! Can't you at least walk a _little_ faster?" Eiji pleaded as Fuji sighed but obliged to his wish.

The pair was halfway out of the school building when some sinister laughter sent Eiji and Fuji to an immediate stop.

"Fuji, did you hear that?" Eiji asked him, pointing to the classroom from which the laugh came from. The two crept closer. Fuji slowly opened the door and the two peered in, hurrying to tennis practice quickly overtaken by curiosity.

"It's Inui," Fuji noted. Eiji nodded. What he was doing there, the two weren't too sure until he suddenly turned around and held a pitcher of dark blue liquid high in the air with a sense of accomplishment on his face.

"It's finally finished!" he announced. Then he noticed Fuji and Eiji. Well, actually it was more like Eiji trying to drag Fuji off before they become intoxicated.

"Hey, Inui, is that a new juice?" Fuji asked smiling as always as he walked in with Eiji desperately trying to stop him in tow.

"Nya! Fuji! We're going to _die_ here! _DIE_! Let's get out of this place before Inui's juice kills us both!" Eiji begged, clinging onto Fuji's legs. The prodigy simply ignored him.

"Yes," Inui said evilly, pouring a bit of it into a cup and waving it in front of a terrified Eiji. "It's the Magical Inui Juice Remix Deluxe 3.8, Limited Edition Golden Version. Want to be the first to try?" Eiji shook his head.

"I'll try," Fuji volunteered happily as Inui handed him the glass.

"No! Fuji, you're too young to die, nya!" Eiji screamed, trying to get the glass away from Fuji with no avail.

"It's all right, Eiji, everything's completely edible," Inui assured the traumatized redhead. "If it make you feel any better, you can do it with Fuji." Inui held the pitcher in Eiji's face.

"Pass!" Eiji said quickly, trying not to gag at the foul smell from the juice. Inui shrugged and withdrew the pitcher much to Eiji's relief.

"Saa… here goes, cheers!" Fuji said trying to block out Eiji's wails to stop. He drained the whole cup in one gulp.

It happened very fast, and if you asked the three of them to try and recall it, they would say it was the most bizarre thing they've ever seen. As soon as Fuji drank the last drop, a sort of blue light engulfed the mystified teen as surprise washed over Inui and Eiji. Before they knew what was really going on, a blinding light spread threw the whole room and… POOF! Everything returned to normal. The whole thing happened in less that a couple of seconds at most, but everything seemed more or less the same. Well, _almost_. Wasn't that totally lame?

"Hmm… strange, my other Inui Juices never had this sort of reaction… must be that Magical Chemical 3.8. I think should just stick to the ingredients I know from now on to avoid such circumstances again," Inui mused. "Well, anyway, Fuji… Fuji…!"

"Nya! Inui, next time you decide to put some magical chemical thing that you don't really know a lot about in one of your juices, warn us! I mean, Fuji could've… Fuji…!"

Fuji stared strangely at the two who were gaping at him, completely dumbstruck. They didn't even seem to snap out of it as Inui dropped the whole pitcher of Inui Juice on the floor. "Are you two alright?"

The two said nothing, only staring at Fuji, or well, more specifically, his chest. Now that he noticed it, Fuji did think for some reason his uniform was a bit tighter than usual…

"Eiji? Inui?" Fuji asked. Something was definitely up. "Eiji! Inui!"

"Fuji… I… I…I…" Inui started to say, but was at a complete loss of words on how to express the situation.

"Um… it's not… _that_ bad… I think…" Eiji said slowly. The two were still staring, and quite frankly, it was getting on Fuji's nerves.

"What are you two staring a-" Fuji's eyes snapped opened at the sight as he followed their gaze onto himself. Turning around, he hastily ripped opened his uniform he peered down. After a couple of seconds of staring in plain shock, Fuji Syusuke did the most out of character thing in his life. He screamed, and he screamed, and he screamed. And he sounded like a girl. Because at the present moment, he _is_ a girl. Or should I say 'she'?


	2. Fujiko Suzume

* * *

Chapter Two: Fujiko Suzume

* * *

And Fuji, completely out of character, screamed, and screamed, and screamed, until two first year boys peeked in to check the commotion but immediately withdrew after hearing Fuji scream, and scream, and scream, and, well, scream. You could say it was utterly unexpected and devastating. Wouldn't you scream too if you suddenly found yourself of the opposite gender? Well, you might faint too, but that's not the point! 

"Inui!" Fuji hissed dangerously. His voice was more or less the same, though a bit higher in pitch. "_EXPLAIN!_"

"Uh, well, you see…" Inui began as he plunged into a full and very detailed explanation of how the Magical Inui Juice Remix Deluxe 3.8, Limited Edition Golden Version came to be. Fuji twitched harder and harder with each sentence until he finally snapped.

"Well, I hope you have the remedy for during _this_!" Fuji fumed, jabbing at his chest. Inui sort of inched towards the left, for he knew that when Fuji, boy or girl for that matter, had that flame blazing in his icy eyes meant that somebody was going to get hurt.

"Fuji, calm down, this isn't like you at all!" Eiji reasoned. The Fuji he knew rarely got angry off court, and was usually smiling, but this Fuji in front of him looked ready to send everyone on the earth to hell. If Fuji had such powers, Eiji was sure he'd use them now.

"This isn't _me_!" Fuji screeched. The usually calm and collected prodigy was now throwing a frantic fit, which was very out of character for him. "How do you expect me to explain this to my family? My teachers? The rest of the tennis club!"

"Fuji-" Eiji began, but was cut off by a spazzed out Fuji.

"And what about-"

"Fuji-"

"Or how about-"

"_Fuji_-"

"And-" And Fuji Syusuke was knocked out cold.

"Thanks, Inui," Eiji sighed, glad that Fuji wasn't screeching his vocal chords off. Inui lifted his math notebook from Fuji's head. "But what are we going to do about… uh… her?"

Inui shrugged as the two just simply stood there staring at the knocked-out Fuji, still trying to digest what had happened. It just simply didn't process.

"Chance of this happening… zero percent," Inui said calmly. "But then how could this have happened then? It's like magic, but that's illogical…"

"Magic?" Eiji supplied. "That Magical Chemical 3.8 sounded sort of strange."

"Perhaps," Inui mused. More silence, staring, and digesting continued.

"So, like you was saying, Eiji, what are we going to do about, uh, her?"

"Well… eh… good question." (From now on I'll refer to Fuji as 'she' since it sort of makes more sense in this situation.)

* * *

Fuji never really woke up from that state. It was sort of like she bolted up, stared at Eiji and Inui for a couple of seconds, then preceded to have the worst mental breakdown any person could possibly have. 

"Why… was it because I did something wrong?" Fuji said blankly to herself between some psychotic giggles, having completely lost it. "Was it because I was bad and enjoyed seeing my friends and family getting crushed by rage and humiliation?" The thought of calming the teen immediately were slashed out of Eiji and Inui's minds as they heard those words spoken.

"Fuji, uh, for starters, I think you should put this on," Inui told her, showing Fuji a girl's uniform that Eiji had found in some old closet. It was a little wrinkled and such, but it looked like it would fit Fuji at least.

"What?" Fuji said, immediately leaving mental breakdown mode, which caused the two boys to think she was actually faking it for the most part. "I'm not wearing _that_!"

"Come on, Fuji! If you don't wear it, someone might recognize you and-" Eiji was again, cut off.

"NO! NEVER!" Fuji screeched as she snatched the uniform, kicked the two guys out and proceeded to change her clothes. It was possibly the hardest thing she had ever done.

* * *

"That's odd…"Oishi commented. "Eiji, Fuji, and Inui aren't here yet." Scanning the courts to see if his words proved him wrong, Oishi was disappointed as no trace of his three teammates could be seen. 

"I saw them during lunch, so they should be here," Momo said as Oishi cast a very concerned look to no one in particular.

"Do you think something happened?" Oishi gasped, millions of horrible and painful situations filled Oishi's mind as what could have happened to the three. "What if they're all hurt? I'll go search for them!"

"Tell the three of them to run a hundred laps when you find them," Tezuka mumbled as Oishi dashed off. Everyone else shrugged and continued their practice.

* * *

Meanwhile, in Inui's lab/classroom, the two boys, haven gotten Fuji into a girl's uniform, were staring at the girl with wonder. Thankfully, she seemed to have regained some composure and some of that calmness she possessed when she was uh… a he. 

"Nya! Fuji, it's still you, right?" Eiji asked slowly as Fuji smoothed out wrinkles and tried to get her bow tied. The ribbon was large, and pink, and nothing like the thin white laces she tied on her shoes, so naturally, it turned out to be all uneven and sort of twisted.

"Who else would and could I possibly be?" Fuji hissed. Turning to Inui, he demanded again. "Inui, you better have the cure."

"Well… no, but effects should only last about…" Inui started, but was afraid to finish.

"About…" Fuji encouraged, a forced smile on her face.

"About a week."

A tense silence followed, and Eiji thought for sure Fuji would break out into another screaming fit, but instead, the girl just sighed and smiled, as if nothing was wrong. But since it was coming from Fuji, the two knew there was definitely something wrong.

"Great, perfect," Fuji said curtly, much to the surprise of the other two. "I'm stuck as a girl for a week, and Inui here doesn't have any sort of remedy that could cure it sooner. Wonderful." Getting up Fuji grabbed his things and pushed the two boys out of the way and headed for the door, despite pleas to stop. The only thing on Fuji's mind at that moment were four letters that spelt the word doom.

* * *

"Eh?" Oishi wondered as he stopped short to listen in on a conversation that was being taken behind a closed door. He could make out Eiji's voice immediately, and then after a few seconds, Inui's. He immediately lit up. Fuji must be with them also then, so he had found all three of them unharmed! Or so he thought… 

The violent opening of the classroom door interrupted his thoughts.

* * *

Fuji rarely panicked, but now was one of those times. She just wanted to go to some place where she could be alone to somehow… assess her situation, maybe scream at and hurt someone, but as soon as she had opened the door, she came face to face with Oishi. 

"Nya! This is terrible!" Eiji sighed as he hopped up followed quickly by Inui. "Fuji's going to be humiliated for the rest of his life if everyone finds out!"

"Uh… hi. Is Eiji here?" Oishi asked. The girl seemed so vaguely familiar…

"Uh-"

"Oh, Oishi!" Eiji said quickly, shoving Fuji to one side. "Wh-what are you doing here?"

"Oishi, aren't you suppose to be at practice?" Inui asked, shoving Fuji out of Oishi's sight.

"Uh… I was searching for you two and Fuji. Is he here?"

"Um, uh… Fuji got a really bad headache and had to go home," Eiji thought up quickly.

"Is he alright?" Oishi gasped, feeling ashamed that he didn't know that one of his teammates had been sick.

"Yeah, just needed a little rest," Inui supplied with a nervous laugh. _Percentage of Oishi not asking about who that girl was… five percent._

And ask he did. "Oh, that's a relief. Eiji, who was that girl?"

Silence…

"Eiji?"

Silence…

"Inui?"

Silence…

"I'm new!" Fuji said with a forced smile as she squeezed between Eiji and Inui. She couldn't hide her current state forever. As long as no one finds out that she was actually who she was suppose to be, might as well try to play along, right? It was going to be a painful week for sure.

"Yeah, she's Fu… uh… Fu… Fujiko!" Eiji said lamely, nearly letting it slip as Fuji twitched in the background.

"Yeah, Fujiko S…S… uh, Suzume!" Inui choked out. Fuji slapped her forehead in defeat. Indeed, it was the lamest name the two could supply, but it wasn't like she could do any better.

"He, I mean, uh, she, uh… transferred in uh, today, and we're uh… showing her around, yeah! That's why we're late for practice, ehehehe…" Eiji lied, hoping Oishi wouldn't see through it. Luckily he didn't.

"Oh, I'm sure Tezuka would understand that and wouldn't make you two run that one hundred laps. (Eiji: -twitch- one hundred laps?) Hello, Fujiko-san, please to meet you," Oishi went on politely as he extended a hand which Fuji took. Her hand was twitching like mad though.

"Yeah, please to meet you too," Fuji croaked as she continued twitching. You could have easily mistaken it for a seizure if she had twitched some more.

_It's doom for you, Syusuke, doom…_ Fuji thought painfully.


	3. A Challenge

* * *

Chapter Three: A Challenge

* * *

"We have to tell him," Eiji stated simply as Fuji violently shook her head. The three had decided to slip away after Oishi had gone back to tell Tezuka what was happening, and was now currently trying to force Fuji into allowing them to tell Tezuka about the situation. So far, their persuasion hasn't been going well at all.

"No. Besides, Tezuka will never believe it!" Fuji insisted as she tried to tie her bow properly for the eighth time.

"Well, before that," Inui began, "we should figure what to do with uh… Fujiko here once night comes. I doubt uh…. her parents will believe she's actually their son."

"Nya! He can stay at my place! The old Fuji use to do that all the time when he helps me study for tests!" Eiji offered.

"Eiji, I don't think your family will recognize me," Fuji pointed out, examining herself once more and shuddering at the sight. It was horror I tell you, horror! "They'd think I'm your… girlfriend or something."

"Nya! Don't say that Fuji! It's too weird!" Eiji exclaimed, fighting away the bad thoughts from his mind. A sadistic smile hung from Fuji's lips just like it did when she was a he. It would seem the old Fuji was coming back, at least the mental part.

"Sorry, Eiji. I guess I can't stay at Inui's either, huh?" Fuji continued, sighing.

"I'm sorry, my room is full of test tubes and other lab equipments, and the rest of the house is very messy. I think my parents would suspect something was up also," Inui said, pushing his glasses up. Fuji sighed. This was not going to be easy.

"Hey, why don't we ask that girl who's always around Ochibi?" Eiji said suddenly. "I'm sure she'd be willing to!"

"Yes, but might I remind you that she's the granddaughter of the coach? There's a twenty-five percent chance she'll recognize you," Inui explained.

"Then what about her friend?" Eiji asked.

"She's her friend, simple enough," Inui shrugged. The three sighed and continued thinking.

They had already passed countless streets and were walking at complete random to no place in particular. The sun was starting to hang low in the sky with a wistful glow. Time was ticking, and the three knew it. They had to think of something and soon.

"By the way," Fuji brought up as a spark of anger flickered in her eyes. "_Fujiko Suzume_?"

Eiji laughed nervously as he decided to walk a little farther away from Fuji. Inui did the same. "Uh, well… I nearly said 'Fuji', so there weren't a lot of options, and it just so happens your pet name was the first thing that popped into my head, ehehehe…" Eiji said.

"I thought you'd like it, seeing it sort of refers to one of your favorite moves," Inui said because 'Suzume' literally meant 'sparrow'. Fuji sighed yet again, something she found herself doing a lot of today. Why couldn't they have picked a better name!

Suddenly a loud cheer erupted towards the trio's right, startling the bunch. Without having much to do, the three decided to check it out, seeing that no ideas were sparking in their brains at the moment. After climing up a series of stairs that lead to the street tennis place. Eiji spotted what was happening first.

"Hey! Aren't they Shinji and Kamio from Fudomine?" he asked. The three went farther ahead until Eiji reconized their opponents.

"Look! It's Ochibi and Momo! Let's go say hi!" Eiji said happily as he began trotting towards them.

"Are you crazy?" Fuji hissed as she grabbed Eiji's arm. "What if they recognize me?"

Eiji stopped short and took a few seconds to examine Fuji again. She still had the same colored hair, though now it seemed a bit shinier and seemed to have magically grown an inch or two longer. Her overall frame was slimmer, she seemed to have shrunk a couple of centimeters, and her voice was of a higher pitch. The rest… do I even need to explain?

"They won't!" Eiji announced after a couple of moments.

"Eiji's right. There is a zero percent that they will believe you have turned into a girl," Inui said logically as Fuji reluctantly followed the two towards the courts.

"Let's hope you're right, Inui," Fuji mumbled.

"And a ninety-five percent chance that they will recognize you and think you're cross dressing," Inui said under his breathe, because he was sure Fuji would not want to hear those words.

* * *

"Oi! Echizen! What do you think you're doing?" Momoshiro hollered at the freshman regular. "Go _left_! _Left_!"

"I _am_ going left!" Ryoma retorted as he sent the ball flying back to the other side of the court.

"No! You're going towards the right!"

"I'm going towards the _left_! And so are you!"

"No, I'm going towards the _right_!"

"Left!"

"Right!"

"LEFT!"

"RIGHT!"

"15-0", An announced.

"Are you two going to play or not?" Without waiting for an answer, Shinji served the ball. Ryoma and Momo immediately quit their bickering and dove for the ball. Unfortunately, forgetting their strategy as to what to do when the ball goes through the middle, the two ended crashing into each other and landing in a heap.

"30-0" An called.

"Echizen!" Momoshiro called out with frustration, glaring at the boy.

"Momo-sempai," Ryoma returned, also glaring. Shinji decided it was a good time to put his two cents in.

"If you two won't stop fighting, I'm going to serve the ball, and since you two are fighting, you won't be able to return it, but you probably couldn't return it anyways because you two are not as good as we are, because we-"

"SHUT UP!" Ryoma and Momoshiro yelled in unison. "Just serve the ball!"

Shinji served, and as soon as he did, more problems arose for the Momoshiro-Echizen pair.

"Right! It's coming right, Echizen!"

"Left! It's left!"

"Echizen! It's-"

"40-0." An sighed as she finished her commentary and dared to sneak a peek at Momoshiro and Ryoma. She immediately looked away after seeing them in utter wreck. _Must be embarrassing for them…_ she thought.

"Echizen! I thought I told you to go right!" Momoshiro fumed.

"I did go right! _You_ went right too!"

"I went left!"

"Right!"

"Left!"

"Momo-sempai, are you directionally challenged or something?"

"Echizen! How dare you speak to your sempai like that?"

"Hoi, hoi! Are you two fighting again?"

Momoshiro stopped halfway into putting Ryoma into a headlock and looked up to see Eiji looming over them with Inui and a really nervous girl by his side.

"Eiji-sempai! Inui-sempai!" the two exclaimed in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey! Can you three get off the court so we can finish this?" Kamio asked. Eiji and Inui apologized while Fuji kept her mouth shut. Shinji decided once again it was a good time to put in his two cents.

"Who is that girl? I have never seen her before. Could it be that she is one of you two's girlfriend? Or are you actually dating both of them and cheating on both of them? That is a very dirty thing to do because people from then on will look down upon you, your parents would disown you for doing such a horrible crime, you could then move on to become a stalker or a pedophile and then the whole society will-"

"Shinji! The first sentence was enough!" Kamio told him as Shinji finally shut his mouth.

"Eiji-sempai, Inui-sempai, that isn't true, is it? Is she one of you two's girlfriend?" Ryoma asked with amusement as the two's face twisted in disgust.

"Ochibi! Of course she isn't!" Eiji exclaimed as he gave Ryoma a light bonk on the head.

"Eh? Is she Inui-sempai's girlfriend then?" Momoshiro teased. Inui shook his head and whipped out his data book so that no one would be able to disturb him any further.

"Then who is she?" Ryoma and Momoshiro asked in curiosity.

"Eh…"

"Uh…"

"And why does she look like Fuji?" Momoshiro noted. Eiji, Fuji and Inui's inside did a back flip.

"Eh? Don't tell me it's Fuji-sempai is cross-dressing!" Ryoma exclaimed as the wild idea hit his head. He moved closer as if to inspect her.

"Hey, you got a point, Echizen!" Momoshiro agreed as he too moved closer to inspect.

"Um…"

"Er…"

Eiji and Inui didn't know how to react, and Fuji, who hadn't said anything, was starting to panic a bit. Only a bit.

"What do you mean? Who is this 'Fuji-sempai' you are talking about?" Fuji asked, trying her best to act oblivious. In truth, it was kind of weird pretending not to know.

"Are you sure you're not him dressed up as a girl?" Momoshiro asked, unconvinced.

"I don't really get what's going on," Fuji said with a strained innocence. Inui and Eiji weren't helping one bit.

"Hmm… Any proof? Because you look and strangely sound just like him," Ryoma pointed out.

_Calm down, Fuji, calm down…_ Fuji thought. _It's going to be all right, it's going to be all right, it's going to be all right…Oh, who am I kidding? This is Momo and Echizen! Of course it's not going to be all right!_

"Uh, what do you mean proof?" Fuji asked with a nervous laugh. Ryoma was a little too close to her face for her comfort. Then she felt a racket being not so lightly pushed into her chest and immediately jumped back, flinching and twitching.

"Nope, it's not Fuji-sempai," Ryoma announced calmly as he pulled down on his cap, turned around and walked towards the net. Momoshiro looked after him with a stunned face as Eiji tried to prevent himself from laughing. Inui didn't really notice anything as he had just recently accepted the fact that Fuji was now a girl, and returned to scribbling down data as if it were normal for boys to turn into girls every day. (Though he was smiling in amusement.)

"Yo! Echizen! Do you have no shame whatsoever!" Momoshiro yelled after him.

"I just poked her with my racket," Ryoma frowned as if doing such things were normal. Momoshiro gave up. Echizen was one heck of a guy. "You would've done it if I hadn't eventually."

"No I wouldn't have!"

"Give me 'proof'!"

"ECHIZEN!"

"Can we just get on with the game?" Kamio spat as Shinji served. Momoshiro and Ryoma immediately digested what was happening, and dove for their rackets. However, Fuji got to Ryoma's first.

"Uh… 40-15?" Ann spoke uncertainly.

"Wait! That isn't fair!" Kamio stated, pointing at Fuji. "She wasn't playing!"

"Sorry, but it was going to hit me. Did you really expect me to just simply let it hit my pretty innocent face?" Fuji said sweetly, covered in sarcasm. Turning to Ryoma, Fuji gave him a whack on the head with his racket and not so nicely said, "Here you go, little boy."

* * *

"Hey, you must be pretty good to return that serve of Shinji's. Do you play tennis?" An asked. Fuji had decided to sit next to her versus Eiji and Inui who had now taken up a liking to annoy her.

"Yes," Fuji answered simply as she watched another brawl break out between Momoshiro and Ryoma. "Do you?" she continued, even though she already knew the answer was yes as well. _Pretend you don't know anything. Pretend you don't know anything. Pretend you don't know anything…_

"Yup! My older brother's the captain of the Fudomine tennis club. Those guys are in there too," Ann said, gesturing to Kamio and Shinji, who were clearly annoyed that both of them had zero attention directed to them from their bickering opponents.

"Oh? And why are they playing so viciously?" Fuji questioned as An laughed.

"Well, Momoshiro wanted me to help him with his homework for who knows what reasons seeing we don't even go to the same school, and Kamio wanted me to help him go out and pick a present for his mother's birthday, even though it just passed last month, so…" An sighed.

"Ah… they're fighting over you," Fuji laughed. She already knew both their requests were just excuses to spend time with An. An just shook her head.

"By the way, you're not related to Fuji Syusuke are you? You look just like him," An noted as Fuji froze. _And Inui said no one would recognize me…_

"N-no! I'm Fujiko Suzume, nice to meet you!" Fuji forced out. She literally wanted to gag at the sound of her words. An blinked a few times, but bought the lie.

"Nice to meet you too. I'm Tachibana An. You're from Seigaku?" she asked, pointing at Fuji's uniform. Fuji reluctantly nodded.

"Are you in the tennis club?" she pushed further. Fuji nodded again, though she wasn't really sure if it was true anymore.

"Want to have a match after they're done?"


	4. KuniChan!

* * *

Chapter Four: Kuni-Chan!

* * *

"Game and match, Ibu-Kamio pair, 6-0," Ann announced as Momoshiro let out a sigh of defeat. Ryoma tried to get away quickly, but Momoshiro would have none of it.

"Echizen! You know it's your fault we lost, right!" Momoshiro demanded as Ryoma winced as his angry state.

"Um…"

"ECHIZEN!" Shinji decided it's time for another of his two cent's.

"You two lost because you two were arguing. If you argue too much, people will become scared of you because you're always yelling. You'll loose your voice because you argue too much, and then you'd loose your dignity because you can't stand up for yourself, but it doesn't really matter to you two because you too had no dignity to begin with. Yes. That's why you lost, because-"

"Shinji," Kamio sighed. Then, turning to An he said, "An! You're still keeping that promise you made to us, right? An?"

"Uh, sure, as soon as I finish this match with Suzume-chan," An replied as Kamio looked completely crushed. Nonetheless, everyone except Fuji and An got off the courts to watch.

"So, who is she? Fuji's relative or something?" Momoshiro asked Eiji. Eiji shook his head no as Ann served.

"Uh, no! She's… Fujiko! Fujiko Suzume!" Eiji offered laughing nervously.

"She's new, so we're showing her around town," Inui added to clear up any further confusion.

"Eh?" Ryoma scoffed, unconvinced. "Her name sounds a lot like Fuji-sempai's."

"Oh, let it go, Echizen!" Momoshiro sighed, still a bit disappointed with the lost.

"Whatever," Ryoma huffed.

* * *

The match ended relatively quickly, An getting in a couple of points here and there and even a game due do Fuji's 'stupid' shoes and among other things as she would say. The gang bid each other farewell: An, Kamio and Shinji going one way, Ryoma and Momoshiro going another, and Eiji and Inui trying to figure out what to do with the newly found girl.

"I still think we should tell Tezuka first," Eiji stated.

"He's got a point, Fuji," Inui said, not calling her by her girl name simply because it seemed more normal this way. "Tezuka really ought to know about this."

"And why is that?" Fuji pouted. She was beginning to sound awfully impatient.

"Because your absence at school for the whole week will definitely not go unnoticed by the other regulars. We can pretend you're sick, but that excuse probably wouldn't last for more than a day or two. Not only that, your parents may start to worry. If we could get Tezuka to make up some wild excuse like the regulars are on a trip or something…" Inui trailed off, giving Fuji a moment to consider this option.

"There's more, isn't there?" Fuji said grimly, a twisted smile playing on her lips.

"…Not only that, Tezuka could possibly… lend you a place to stay for the week."

"_What!_" Fuji growled, eyes flickering open. Both Eiji and Inui decided it was safer to walk further away from Fuji at that moment.

"Inui's right! I mean, Tezuka's parents would trust him and all with a girl…" Eiji offered, though he was absolutely sure that Fuji wouldn't even listen.

"_What!_" Fuji repeated, icy blue eyes still wide opened.

"Fuji, it's logical. We'll just pretend you're your cousin or something," Inui said as Fuji scowled.

"I still don't think his parents would let me, and I certainly don't want to stay at Tezuka's for a week," Fuji replied coldly, gagging at the thought. Her mind would be overunned with boredom and stoic-ness and... boredom...

"It's too bad you think that way, Fuji," Eiji smiled sadly. "I'd really like to see Tezuka's room. I mean, you can probably find out what's behind that frown or something." Fuji immediately perked up. The thought of that gave Fuji thoughts of getting endless amounts of blackmail on Tezuka and the correct way to push more of the captain's buttons was a very enticing offer. All she needed now was a good excuse.

"Hmm… I'll consider it," Fuji said, a mischievous smile dancing on his lips. "In fact, this can be a very good opportunity to get to know Tezuka better. Hehehe… What's the plan?"

Inui and Eiji were shocked at how quick Fuji changed her mind, not to mention her way of thinking. They didn't even want to know what she meant by 'get to know Tezuka better', though they imagined it essentially revolved around Fuji's joy of watching others get crushed by humiliation and rage, A.K.A. blackmail.

"Okay… that' perfect!" Fuji announced, snapping Eiji and Inui out of their thoughts. It seemed the prodigy had already devised a plan on her own. The two, even though half afraid, were looking forward to see how this would turn out. They had a right to be terrified all right.

* * *

Bang! Bang!

Tezuka snapped his head out of a book her was reading and scanned the room looking for the source of the sound. Deciding it was just the wind, he continued reading. Soon after, more bangs came, but they too were ignored. More bangs followed, and Tezuka was starting to get fed up. Getting up, he strode over to the window, opened it and looked outside. Nothing. Then, he looked down.

"Wonderful night, isn't it Tezuka?" Inui said casually, a tiny pebble in hand. "I just happened to walk by."

"Inui," Tezuka said shortly. "What is this all about?"

"What do you mean Tezuka?" Inui asked, trying to stay oblivious. "I was just innocently taking a nighttime walk, and I just so happened to end up in front of your bedroom window!"

"Inui, something's up, do tell," Tezuka said dryly as Inui sighed.

"Ah! I'm defeated!" Inui announced in complete deadpan. Oh well, this was what Fuji had told him to say. "I cannot hide anything from you, Tezuka."

"…"

"Well, you see…"

* * *

"Ne, Fuji, are you sure this'll work?" Eiji asked nervously as he rang the doorbell. Fuji just smiled, but giving no answer. Eiji was about to ask again when the door opened.

"Um… hi!" Eiji said, not sure exactly how to reply to the woman standing in front of him. "Uh, this is where Tezuka Kunimitsu lives, right?"

The woman cocked her head to one side, blinked a few times, and just when Eiji thought she was going to slam the door on them, she unexpectedly smiled. "Eh! My Kuni-chan has friends visiting him? Oh! I can't believe he didn't tell me about this! Come in, come in! I'm so happy to have both of you!"

"Uh, yeah," Eiji replied with a weak laugh as the two stepped in. Fuji's eyes immediately darted around for anything that she considered embarrassing for Tezuka.

"Oh! I'm sorry! I wasn't expecting this! I'll go make tea and something to eat immediately! Please excuse me! Kuni-chan's up in his room by the way!" the woman who seemed like Tezuka's mother said as she rushed off to the kitchen.

"Ooo... I think I should call Tezuka 'Kuni-chan' from now on," Fuji giggled evilly. It was quite a frightening experience for Eiji seeing a girl Fuji giggle with so much… evilness.

"Ehehehehe…" Eiji replied sheepishly. Then something on the table caught his eye, and he reached for it. "A photo album?" Fuji immediately abandoned her giggling and snatched it away from Eiji, a wicked smirk on his face. Eiji decided it was safer to scoot an inch or six away from her.

"Eh? 'Kuni-chan's Toddler Days'," Fuji read off the cover. This caught Eiji's attention and he decided to scoot back.

"Hey, Fuji, should we really open it?" the redhead asked. "I mean, it is Tezuka's personal-" However, Fuji wasn't even listening as she was already snickering over a picture of a three-year-old Tezuka unhappily sitting in front of a birthday cake with three candles and a ridiculous party hat on his head. Now _that_ was truly scary.

"Now if only I had a camera…"

* * *

"So that is why I am here at your window so humbly begging you to allow Fujiko Suzume to spend the night at your house," Inui finished explaining to Tezuka the whole story. It wasn't easy, mind you, even with the specially prepared script Fuji had written for him. Inui constantly had to edit out parts, and he had a strong feeling Tezuka was not going to buy or like any of it. He didn't.

"Inui, go home and get some rest," Tezuka said simply as he began to close his window. Inui still had one ace up his sleeve, however.

"Refuse this and I'm afraid I'll have to use this one you," Inui said, retrieving a small vile from his pocket. "It's the last remaining sample of my Magical Inui Juice Remix Deluxe 3.8, Limited Edition Golden Version after Fuji smashed the pitcher. I'm not sure of the effects, but according to my calculations, there's sixty-eight percent chance that you'll not be able to attain your form as it is right now."

Tezuka sighed. He didn't know how, and he didn't want to know how, but Inui would somehow find a way to poison him with that vile. Of course, Tezuka still didn't believe an ounce of what he said until…

"Kuni-chan!" Tezuka sighed as he turned around to answer his mother. Inui looked on with interest.

"Yes, Mother?"

"Where are your manners young man? How come you did not inform me that this adorable transfer student from America would be spending the night here? Oh, come, come, Suzume-chan! Kuni-chan's room's right up here!"

Tezuka could only gape in stunned silence as his mother allowed herself into his room with a snickering Eiji and a girl that looked like Fuji. A lot like Fuji. _Way_ too much like Fuji.

"Nice to meet you, Kuni-chan," the girl said evilly.

* * *

"Inui!" Tezuka hissed so that only Inui could hear. There was something definitely wrong with this scene according to Tezuka. "_Explain_!"

"You know, Fujiko-chan there said the same thing once she drank this," Inui told Tezuka as he gave the glass vile a little shake.

"I'll leave you children alone now!" Tezuka's mother called. "But really! Next time you have transferred students touring your school and you're suppose to provide them a place for the night, just tell me, Kuni-chan! It's nothing to be embarrassed about!" And with that, she left the room, happy that her little Kuni-chan had such _wonderful_ friends.

Silence…

"Out! All of you!" Tezuka hissed as he pointed towards the door in calm frustration, if that was even humanely possible, but that's not the point.

"I'll leave it to you then, Eiji, Fuji," Inui sighed. "I should be going home to do my homework now. Bye. Don't do anything stupid." The last comment was specifically directed towards Fuji, who just smiled sweetly, 'sweet' meaning compared to poison honey.

"Now, now Inui! We'll have lots of fun, won't we, _Kuni-chan_?" Fuji laughed sadistically, placing a hand on Tezuka's shoulder, which he coolly removed.

"Fuji, stop," Tezuka said in total deadpan, even though you could see a spark of anger and discomfort in his eyes. Tezuka hoped that this was all just a joke. After all, Fuji couldn't _really_ have turned into a girl, could he have? _Could he have_?

"I'm not Fuji anymore, Tezuka. I'm Fujiko-chan for the week," Fuji informed him. "Want me to prove it to you?"

"No, Fuji, I don't," Tezuka immediately replied. After a second of thought he added. "Go home, both of you."

"Might I remind you I don't have a home I can go back to?"

"Fuji…"

"Please, Tezuka?"

"No."

"Please, Kuni-chan?"

"_No_."

"Please, captain?"

"_NO_."

"Eiji, help me."

Eiji said nothing, so Fuji tried again.

"Eiji?"

More silence, then quickly followed the closest thing Tezuka would ever come to screaming.

"Eiji!" Tezuka said dangerously. "Twenty laps around my house, now! And after you're finished, _go home_." Eiji looked genuinely shocked, and was about to retort, but he knew it would only go up to thirty and then forty and so on, so he decided to keep his mouth shut and just go outside to run them as quick as he could and go home to brush his teeth. He hoped Fuji and Tezuka would be able to work everything out.

"Oh! What's this? 'Kuni-chan's Firsts?'" Fuji read with an evil cackle. Think clapping thunder and flashing lightning sort of evil cackle. "My, my, my... I never knew you kept these things so close to heart."

"Fuji…" Tezuka warned.

"It's 'Fujiko-chan' this week, remember? I'm a girl," Fuji told him again. It was still a bit strange to be in a girl's body, but if it meant being able to see Tezuka pulling out his first tooth and almost drowning at his first swim, then it was _almost_ worth it.

"Fuji, you're not a girl," Tezuka said simply. "You will never be a girl."

"Want me to prove you wrong?" Fuji said again in a bone-chilling tone.

"No, Fuji, keep it to yourself," Tezuka answered, slightly annoyed. Fuji just sighed and continued flipping through the pages, occasionally laughing or exclaiming how 'adorable' or 'cute' Tezuka was when he was little, not at all like the 'serious' and 'boring' person now. Tezuka's calm, cool, collected and intelligent-ness was starting to show signs of cracking.

"Oh! Who's this in the picture?" Fuji asked, blowing everything off. The person was in a pink dress with lace all over it, wore pink shoes with lacey socks, wore several pink ribbons, (lace included) was holding a pink balloon, and scowling.

"Fuji!" Tezuka said as he snatched the photo album and set it on top of his bookshelf where Fuji couldn't reach it. Fuji knew by now that she was really pushing Tezuka to his limits, and even she knew when to stop. That doesn't mean she wasn't disappointed.

"Fine, fine," she said glumly. "I'll explain."

* * *

One day down, six more to go…

* * *


	5. Surviving Practice

* * *

Chapter Five: Surviving Practice

* * *

The rest of the night with Tezuka resolved in Fuji taking over Tezuka's bed without his permission, and forcing him to go sleep on the couch. However, we all know that Fuji's true intensions were to dig up more blackmail, and dig up she did. By the time the two had finished a light breakfast and started off to practice, Fuji had a nice one-inch pile of photographs, essays, and tiny trinkets that would have Tezuka bending head over heel to do whatever Fuji willed and wanted. Oh, yes, how Fuji loved that sense of power.

"So, Tezuka, can you do me a tiny favor?" Fuji pestered as Tezuka scowled.

"What?" he bitterly mumbled as Fuji clapped her hands together in joy. Tezuka did not like the words 'Fuji' and 'joy' being so close together.

"Well, as you know, since I'm going to be a girl for the week, my family probably won't-"

"You are not staying at my house for the week," Tezuka immediately answered. Fuji pouted.

"Actually, I was hoping you could make up an excuse to tell my parents why I won't be returning to the house for the whole week," Fuji asked sensibly. Tezuka continued to scowl, not answering the girl. Fuji decided it was a good time to start using what she collected yesterday.

"My Best Friend, by Tezuka Kunimitsu," Fuji began with a smirk. She was definitely enjoying the look of pure horror on Tezuka's face.

"My best friend is my stuffed kitty name Neko-chan. Neko-chan is-"

"Fine I'll do it, just stop reading," Tezuka hissed. He was really now beginning to regret letting Fuji use his room. He just knew that she had a whole bundle of more blackmail material in her bag. Blame his mother for making him save every single little thing.

"Thank you, Kuni-chan!" Fuji mocked. "Now, would you also be so kind as to handle all of my transferring sheets and applications for the school? After all I can't go to school pretending I'm a boy, can I?"

Tezuka mumbled something incoherent and about why Fuji even wanted to go to school, but Fuji took all that as a yes. The two had now arrived at practice by now. Everyone immediately stopped whatever they were doing as soon as they saw Tezuka accompanied by a girl.

"What are you guys looking at?" Tezuka said to them. "Continue with practice!"

Everyone stuttered a yes and continued. However, everyone's hits were sloppy, their serves were horrendous because they were all just looking at Fuji smilingly evil- I mean sweetly, and Tezuka looking like he accidentally took an unhappy pill too many. Eiji and Inui immediately came up to the two, as well as Momoshiro and Echizen for who knows what reasons.

"Eh…" was what the four said as they bumped into each other.

"We'll go first, right Echizen?" Momoshiro said as Ryoma sighed and took a folded piece of paper out of his pocket. Unfolding it, he announced:

"Fujiko-san, I am very sorry that I shoved my racket up your breast yesterday. I will never do it again. I only did it because I wanted to know if you were actually my sempai cross-dressing, because it seemed like something he would do. Besides, you don't even look that pretty, and-" at this point, Momoshiro yanked the piece of paper out of Echizen's hand, silencing the capped boy by doing so.

"ECHIZEN!" he screamed after quickly scanning the 'apology'. "What kind of apology is that!"

"…I was only telling the truth," Ryoma mumbled as he turned to walk away. However, Fuji's hand clasped around his shoulder, holding him back.

"Don't you owe me something else, little boy?" Fuji said in a wickedly evil tone. Ryoma gulped. Girls were truly of a different species.

"Eh…"

"Let's play a match!" Fuji announced happily as everyone blinked in surprise at how quick her mood changed. "Ne, let me borrow your racket for a while, Kuni-chan, okay?"

Tezuka twitched but nonetheless obliged, seeing he knew that Fuji would have forced him into it some other way nonetheless. He didn't get what was going on at all, and he was quite sure that he didn't want to find out. If only Fuji would stop calling him 'Kuni-chan'. . . Fuji was going to run a lot of laps after she turns back into a boy…

"Nya? Fuji… uh, Fujiko-chan, are you sure you want to do this?" Eiji asked. Everyone turned to look at the girl except Momoshiro, who was still gagging at Ryoma's so called 'apology'.

"Of course!" Fuji replied as if it was so obvious.

"I don't mind," Ryoma mumbled.

* * *

"Best of a one set match, Echizen to serve," Momoshiro announced as the rest of the regulars and practically the entire tennis club gathered around to watch. Why was Tezuka allowing such a thing to happen? And who was that girl?

"Inui, what happened?" Tezuka asked. Fuji's story that she told him yesterday sounded too farfetched.

"Eh? I thought Fujiko-chan told you everything, didn't she, Kuni-chan?" Inui smirked as an irritated look crossed Tezuka's face. Inui knew that the percentage of Tezuka making him run laps was one hundred percent. Data doesn't lie.

"Inui, twenty laps, now," Tezuka ordered as Inui took off. Eiji took up the data boy's previous spot next to Tezuka.

"Nya, who do you think will win?" Eiji asked with interest.

"Eiji, is that the same Fujiko-san from yesterday?" Oishi asked as Eiji meekly nodded, too engrossed in the match.

"Eh? Fujiko-chan? That reminds me of Fuji… where is he anyways?" Kawumura asked.

"He's visiting a dying relative and will be gone for the week," Tezuka made up, keeping his face straight. You couldn't pick up a single clue that he was lying.

"Oh, I see…" Kawumura murmured sadly. He'd have to ask Fuji about that later.

"Fshuu…I don't buy it," Kaidoh mumbled, but everyone had already turned back to the match. It was now four games to three, Ryoma leading.

"Heh, not bad, Echizen, not bad," Fuji mused as she bounced the ball a few times. _Saa… a few tricks won't give me away, right?_ Adding a spin to the ball, Fuji served.

"Hey! Isn't that… isn't that one of Fuji's moves? Is she related to Fuji?" Oishi gasped as Ryoma took a swipe at the ball and missed, only to hear:

"Game, Fujiko, four games all," Momoshiro sighed as he leaned back into his seat.

"Nya? She can do that in that state?" Eiji mused. Leaning closer to Tezuka, Eiji whispered, "Nya, Tezuka, what did Fujiko here blackmail you with to let her do such a thing?"

"Kikumaru, twenty laps, now," Tezuka snapped as the acrobat sighed. Tezuka must have waked up on the wrong side of the bed. He was crankier that usual.

"What did Eiji do?" Oishi asked, blinking.

"Oishi, twenty laps now."

"Huh? Tezuka? Why are you-"

"Kawamura, twenty laps now."

Kaidoh dared a small smile, but was only greeted with a "Kaidoh twenty laps now."

"Ehehehe… Tezuka-buchou sure is scary today," Horio commented somewhere in the background with the two other freshmen.

"Everyone, twenty laps now!" Tezuka demanded. Everyone was of course, taken aback, but obeyed nonetheless. So now they were all forced to watch the Fujiko versus Echizen match while running. And Tezuka… Tezuka was just plain unhappy.

"Heh… no bad," Ryoma commented as the two continued rallying. "Are you sure you're not related to Fuji-sempai?"

"No," Fuji said flatly as she hit a hard return, ensuring her the game.

"Game, Fujiko, four games to five," Momoshiro announced. Everyone (still running of course, courtesy of Tezuka) was rather surprised that an utter stranger, a girl stranger no less, could have faired so well against Ryoma. But they also knew that this is where the real game started.

"Heh… not bad at all, but-"

"Mada mada dane, right?" Fuji smirked as Ryoma mumbled something about it being his line. Fuji had completely crushed his rise to confidence. Such a pity. But nonetheless, the look in the two's eyes showed that they weren't about to hold anything back now.

* * *

"G-game, Fujiko, s-six games to seven," Momoshiro concluded, stuttering. He, and along with almost all the rest of the tennis club (save the three who knew Ryoma was actually playing Fuji) were absolutely shocked, but Ryoma was the most shock of all probably.

_Saa… shouldn't have used to many dead giveaways…_ Fuji mused. She recalled having accidentally used Tsubame Gaeshi at least once, and almost having used Higuma Otoshi, but prevented herself at the last moment when she remembered she was wearing a skirt still. Hopefully, no one would make any assumptions like Ryoma did, but…

"WAH! Sakuno! Look! Look! That girl that beat my adorable Ryoma-sama looks just like Fuji-sempai! And she uses the same moves too!"

"Eh, Tomo-chan…"

"Sakuno! _Sakuno_! I think it's Fuji-sempai cross-dressing!"

There was an immediate silence on the courts as everyone suddenly stopped running (some so abruptly that everyone behind him fell into a heap) and just stared at Fuji. Fuji herself mentally kicked herself. What was it with the cross dressing deal? She didn't look _that_ feminine, when she was a he, did she?

"Do something, Tezuka!" Fuji mouthed to Tezuka. After half a second of nothing, Fuji added, "_or else_!" That got Tezuka going.

"Why did everyone stop? She's my cousin. Continue running, and add another twenty laps!" Tezuka announced as everyone groaned, but continued running nonetheless. Tezuka was not happy that he had to cover up for Fuji. Really, his cousin? Why couldn't he have done better and used that foreign exchange student excuse like Fuji did yesterday? Well, at least he didn't say girlfriend, that would have been just plain freaky and detestable…

* * *

"Awww! Kuni-chan! Thanks for saving my cover back there! I feel like I should give you something really special!" Fuji melodramatically thanked the stoic captain. Tezuka was still not happy, but then again, was he really ever?

"Give me back the things you stole from my room," Tezuka answered flatly as Fuji frowned. No way was she going to do that, ever.

"Nope, and I never intend to," Fuji smirked as Tezuka scowled. "Well, I should be off trying to find some place I could stay over at tonight seeing Kuni-chan's so mean not to let me stay anymore." Giving Tezuka a sweet smile, a quick hug (much to Tezuka's dismay) and a girly wave, Fuji skipped, yes, Fuji _skipped_ off to find her next victim for blackmailing. Isn't it wonderful to be a girl?

Tezuka? Tezuka was still calm and cool as ever, but made a mental note of making Fuji keep running until the boy (or girl as she is now) had shed off all of his psycho-ness. Maybe a thousand laps would do the trick?

* * *

Eiji and Inui eventually caught up to Fuji, and the three were now trying to think of whose house she should go to tonight. The conversation went like this:

"Well, it should be someone from the other schools, seeing they'd have a less chance of recognizing you, or-" Inui was rudely cut off by Fuji, who had already had a plan.

"I can go to Saeki's house. He'd believe I've turned into a girl," Fuji pondered. "But I've already have enough dirt on him…"

"Nya, Fuji? Is that all you think about? Blackmailing people?" Eiji asked.

"Hmm… well, in order to succeed, a little manipulation and push along the way isn't that bad, is it?" Fuji answered as Eiji sighed and shook his head. Fuji was impossible.

"Well, there's a seventy-eight percent chance that you two will think of something before eight o' clock, so there's not much need to worry," Inui explained. Fuji and Eiji cast him strange looks.

"What about you, Inui?" Fuji asked.

"I have to go home and work on a new juice I'm developing," Inui smiled evilly. "So you two have fun on your little date."

"Nya! Inui!" Eiji protested with a slight blush. "Don't put it like that! It's too weird! Why don't you go date Fuji and I go home and finish my homework?"

"Eiji, eighty-two percent of the time you never even start your homework and always end up begging Fuji for the answers," Inui informed him as Eiji pouted. Fuji just stood there and smiled through the whole thing.

"It's alright, Inui," Fuji told him as she grabbed Eiji by the wrist. "Eiji and I will have _lots_ of harmless fun, _right_?"

"…Fuji! You're too scary!" Eiji whined as he got dragged away by an evil Fuji. Inui shrugged and went home to develop his new juice, writing in all the data he had collected today. At this rate, there was a ninety-five percent chance that he will have to get a new notebook tomorrow due to data overload.

* * *

The date, if you could really call it that, went by like any other time Eiji hung out with Fuji, except the fact that Fuji was now Fujiko. After having a pleasant dinner at a nice restaurant that Fuji forced Eiji to go to, (despite his protests that it was too strange and bizarre for them to do that in Fuji's state) the two were now aimlessly walking down the streets, Fuji acting oddly giddy and hyper.

"Fuji, will you please stop giggling?" Eiji whispered. "People are staring at us!"

"Let them stare all they want," Fuji answered with a pleasant smile. Eiji groaned. Inui was so cruel to leave him with Fujiko-chan here. At least she didn't try and hug him like Tezuka… yet.

"Nya! Fuji!" Eiji whined. "You're so evil!" For some reason, those words seemed to be coming out of Eiji's mouth an awful lot these past days.

"Aren't I?" Fuji answered absentmindedly. "Come on, Eiji. There's still someone I want to see if I can catch…"

Eiji decided he wouldn't be dating anyone for the next couple of years right then and there, especially if they were anything like Fuji, dragging him all around. Girls were so strange!

* * *

Fuji always had a knack of knowing where, when, and what people were doing, and his little brother was certainly no exception. In fact, he probably even knew more about Yuuta than actual person himself, always picking up miniscule habits that most of the times proved to be useless at the moment, but quite informative in the future. So how Fuji knew that his little brother was going to be the street tennis courts with some of his teammates at exactly seven forty-nine that night was nothing out of the ordinary.

"Eiji," Fuji said suddenly as they halted.

"Nya?"

"I can take it from here. You can go home if you want."

Eiji frowned and blinked at Fuji a few times before replying in a curious voice. "Are you sure, nya?"

"It's fine. I can handle it," Fuji repeated as Eiji shrugged. Truth to be told, Eiji was _very_ glad that he could escape the insanity of Fuji for the day.

"You know where you're going to stay?" Eiji asked as Fuji nodded, giving him the cue to leave. However, he hadn't even taken two steps when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"By the way… thanks for our little 'date'. It was certainly interesting."

Even though Fuji couldn't see it, she was positive that a tinge of pink had crawled up her friend's cheeks, and she was pretty sure it wasn't just from embarrassment but also a hint of agitation and anger mixed in as well. "_Fuji_!"

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!"

"Nya! You better be!" And with a light punch in the arm Eiji stalked off. Fuji's lips hung in a smug smile for a second or two before turning to watch Yuuta play a purple-clad Mizuki.

_This will certainly be amusing…_


	6. Confusion Over Relationships

**Quick Note:** In case anyone was wondering, Fuji drank the juice on Friday, and now it's Saturday night. Please also note that this chapter and the one that follows it are ridiculous and has no contributions to the plotline whatsoever other than sick humor. At least that's my opinion. (Walks to the corner and sulks because she wrote this and is complaining about it.)

* * *

Chapter Six: Confusion Over Relationships

* * *

"Hey, Yuuta."

"What?"

"Do you know her?"

"Who?"

"Her."

"Who's her?"

"That girl over there."

Tired of making Yuuta guess, Mizuki pointed towards Fuji who was looking at them with interest, and even gave them a small wave as a sign of acknowledgment. Yuuta frowned and shook his head.

"Never seen her before," he replied before facing Mizuki again, only to find his opponent missing. Turning back to face the girl, Yuuta gave an annoyed sigh as he saw the team manager smoothly making his way towards the brunette.

"Yuuta da ne! Is Mizuki hitting on your cousin or something da ne? That's no fair da ne! You should've told me you had such a pretty cousin da ne! I would've liked to date her da ne!" Yanagisawa said proudly as Yuuta and Atsushi (who was also there because Mizuki wanted to play doubles later) rolled their eyes.

"She's not my cousin," Yuuta stated. "And I don't know who she is."

"She looks a lot like your brother," Atsushi pointed out as Yuuta glanced at the girl again. Atsushi was right, she _did _look a lot like his older brother. Maybe a little _too_ much. The hair, the eyes, the smile… they were all the same. Especially the smile.

"Hey, do you think it's actually Fuji Syuuuke in a girl's uniform da ne?" Yanagisawa wondered. (Let's say Fuji borrowed Tezuka's mother's clothes yesterday, changed into a uniform today, and will go clothe shopping in the near future, just to clear up the clothe issue.)

"My brother wouldn't go _that_ far," Yuuta said as he saw Mizuki grinning and leading the innocent (not really) girl their way. The closer they got, the more the girl seem to remind Yuuta of his older brother still. _He wouldn't, right_?

"Yuuta!" The girl perked up as she saw him. "I never knew you were friends with a purple lizard, an ugly duckling, and a little red riding ribbon boy!"

Yuuta blinked in surprise as the girl hopped over to where he was and snaked her arms around his waist, pulling him into a hug. Obviously, he wasn't the only one that was surprised as his teammates stared on with shock.

"Yuuta! You haven't told me how much you love me yet!" Fuji smirked. Toying with Yuuta had always been one of her favorite pastimes as a he.

"Who are you?" Yuuta managed to say Fuji finally let go.

"Yuuta doesn't remember me…" Fuji said sadly. "Yuuta doesn't love me…"

"Yuuta, is she your girlfriend?" Mizuki asked.

"She's pretty da ne. How can you forget her da ne?" Yanagisawa gasped. "If you're not dating Yuuta da ne, would you go out with me da ne?" (Fuji: Eh… no.)

"I knew the ribbon was stupid…" Atsushi muttered.

After a few more questions and discussion about whether if the girl was Yuuta's girlfriend or relative or not, Fuji decided it was time to insert another sparker. After all, why not? The situation was certainly proving to be a humorous one.

"I'm not Yuuta girlfriend, I'm not Yuuta's cousin, and I'm definitely _not_ Yuuta fiancée," Fuji began. Where thy got that thought was beyond even her comprehension.

"Then who are you?" the four St. Rudolph boys chorused. It was meaningless to be conversing with a random girl that none of them knew. They would rather play tennis. (Except probably Mizuki who kept staring at Fuji, much to her dismay and disgust.)

"I'm Yuuta's cute and adorable niece, Fuji Suzume. Everyone calls me Fujiko-chan though," Fuji smiled. That was definitely the bombshell to them.

"…_Niece_!" Yanagisawa choked.

"You have a niece… awesome, way to go," Atsushi said, not really caring much, though it did surprise him quite a bit.

"Niece! That would mean… she would be… Yuuta, your brother would've…" Mizuki stuttered.

"I… have… a… niece…" Yuuta repeated to himself. Then it hit him like a car going at a hundred plus miles per hour. "Wait! That would mean my brother… my brother… he would've had to… that would make me…" Like Mizuki, Yuuta couldn't exactly sort out all of the information.

"That's right, it would make you my Uncle Yuuta!" Fuji smiled evilly. Think of thunder and lighting once again, only this time add some black clouds and a scene of utter destruction behind Fuji. Yeah, that's about right.

Silence…

More silence…

Even _more_ silence…

Then…

"Hey! Echizen! Look! It's Tezuka's cousin!" Everyone snapped out of shock as Fuji silently swore. She had totally forgot the way lame excuse Tezuka had made at practice, and it was just her luck that Momoshiro and Ryoma decided to come here again tonight. Oh well, this just makes things a lot more interesting, right? Fuji cringed. How was she going to get out of this one now?

"Did that oaf just say you're Tezuka's cousin?" Mizuki blinked. "But then…"

"…This is confusing da ne!" Yanagisawa admitted. "My head hurts da ne… I see stars again da ne! Help me da ne!" No one paid any attention naturally.

"I'm going home," Atsushi sighed as he tried to get away, but only ended up being restrained by Mizuki and Yanagisawa.

"…Wait, what?" Yuuta said, completely scattered. "This is- what is- how…"

By now, Momoshiro and Echizen had finished their game and jogged over to where Fuji and the St. Rudolph boys were. Fuji only grimaced at the situation she was faced with.

"Hey! Fujiko-chan!" Momoshiro called as he and Ryoma came up to him. "What are you doing with them?"

"Why aren't you at your cousin Tezuka's house?" Ryoma added, still bitter that he had lost.

"Okay, okay," Mizuki said as he sorted everything out. "This isn't possible because if you're Yuuta's niece _and_ Tezuka's cousin, then-"

"You're Fuji-sempai's younger brother's cousin!" Momoshiro and Ryoma gasped. (only Ryoma used 'the guy I beat' instead)

"It's Yuuta!" Yuuta growled. "Not Fuji's younger brother! And definitely not the guy you beat!" No one, of course, paid any attention to him either.

"Um…" Fuji laughed nervously. _How am I getting out of this!_

"I've got it da ne!" Yanagisawa exclaimed, snapping his fingers as the light bulb went off.

"I highly doubt it," Atsushi sighed.

"It's simple, da ne! See, Yuuta's older sister secretly had an affair with someone and gave birth to Tezuka Kunimitsu da ne! Then Fuji Syusuke had a daughter around the same time, namely Fujiko-chan here da ne! See da ne? That would make the two cousins da ne! And Fuji Yumiko Tezuka's mother and Fuji Syusuke Fujiko-chan's dad da ne! And that would make Yuuta an uncle to Fujiko-chan and Tezuka da ne! Isn't it simple da ne?" Everyone just looked at Yanagisawa like he was an idiot, except Fuji, who was trying to prevent herself from cracking up.

"…That makes no sense whatsoever, at all," Atsushi pointed out, breaking the silence spell that had dawned on the group a couple of seconds before.

"I know! Because there's no way Yumiko could've hid her pregnancy because she was never pregnant!" Yuuta nodded calmly, despite his inner self was in total chaos and was spazzing out.

"And if that were the case, then Fuji-sempai would have had done _that_ around the time he was one or two," Ryoma put in.

"Are you sure you're Yuuta's niece?" Mizuki asked suspiciously as everyone turned to Fuji for an answer.

"Well… It's complicated…" Fuji shrugged. Watching the confused and flabbergasted looks on their faces was priceless.

"Hey! Wouldn't that mean you're Tezuka-buchou's daughter?" Momoshiro gasped suddenly, having not heard any of the reason the others stated before him.

"No… Tezuka-buchou's Fujiko's cousin, and Fujiko's mother is Fuji-sempai's wife, so that would make Tezuka-buchou and Fuji-sempai… somehow related…" Ryoma tried to explain. But as you could see, he was having trouble just like Yanagisawa. "Besides, I think Tezuka-buchou's intelligent enough not to do such stupid things such as having a kid at his age." And just for good riddance, Ryoma added, "Mada mada dane…"

"Hey, you," Atsushi suddenly voiced himself. "Can you explain this?"

"Well, you guys pretty much got the whole picture, so what's there to explain?" Fuji said simply as the two watched the scene play itself out until Mizuki shushed all of them by telling them all to shut up. It was quite funny so to speak. At least to Fuji who was recording the whole conversation on a recorder she hid behind her back.

Truly pointless, this was, unless you could count in more blackmail material for Fuji…

* * *

Fuji had decided to escape the scene with Atsushi, who was tired of doing absolutely nothing but watch people confuse themselves more than they needed to, and now the two were seated in a train, glancing at the passing landscape.

"So, are you really related to Yuuta?" Atsushi brought up.

"That's right," Fuji answered.

"I…see…" Atsushi answered. "And are you really Tezuka's cousin?" he questioned. Fuji thought over this for a few moments. If she said 'yes', then that would make it al the more confusing. If she said 'no', then she would equally make it all the more confusing.

"Why don't you figure that out for yourself?" Fuji suggested. Perfect answer. It was neither a yes nor no, and it was also a signal to close the conversation right there and then.

The two sat in silence for a while, simply staring at the starry sky.

"By the way…" Atsushi began. "Where are you getting off?"

"Where you get off," Fuji answered simply. "I'm going to visit a friend. He offered me a place to stay for the night." Well, in truth, it's more like he will, seeing Fuji will probably blackmail the guy until he has no reputation left and finally agrees.

Atsushi looked at Fuji with a strange look. "That's… nice…"

The trip ended without much discussion between the two except for that of tennis related things. By the time the two got off, it was rather late already, a couple minutes before ten thirty. Ryou had come to pick up his twin, and Fuji silently slipped away before the boy could ask whom she was. So that is how Fuji ended walking down a deserted road, looking for…

* * *

"Found it," Fuji smirked as she gracefully climbed over the fence. She didn't want to alert everyone of what was happening after all. There wasn't much need, and she would rather confront her friend about it before his whole family. That way, they could think of some far-fetched excuse that no one buys, but accept it anyhow. (And of course, that makes no sense whatsoever, but this _is_ Fuji's mind after all!)

Saeki was reading, something that the young boy rarely did. In fact, he didn't even know _why_ he was reading. Well, actually he did, because his sister had forced him to read what was suppose to be 'the best book EVER', but why he was actually doing it was beyond his thoughts. He just was. Okay, enough on that topic.

_Bang! Bang! _

Saeki looked up from his book and at the clock, which read ten fifty-seven. He then turned towards the window, where he had suspected the noise to come from.

_Bang! Bang!_

Abandoning his book, Saeki carefully strode over to the window, and cautiously opened it a crack. Nothing. Then…

"Saeki! Down here!"

Confused, the boy slowly let his eyes wander down to the ground, where none other than Fuji Syusuke stood in all her girly-ness glory. Saeki almost fainted.

"Fuji! What the hell are you doing dressed in a girl's uniform?" he hissed as he slammed the window and dashed downstairs. A few moments later, he was face to face with Fuji, who wore a pleasantly sickening smile on her lips.

"Nice to see you too," Fuji chirped. She knew Saeki would've recognized her. Saeki, meanwhile, was gawking at her up and down, trying to intake everything.

"Fuji you look… you look… you look ridiculous!" he pointed out, though deep down he always knew that Fuji was more cut out to be wearing a girl's uniform than a boy's. Really, everyone knew _that_. The thing fitted Fuji all too well in his opinion.

"But Kojirou, you have to admit I look pretty cute in this, right?" Fuji taunted, giving the boy a wink as she did a twirl.

"Fuji… I know we cross-dressed Yuuta in the past, but you doing this in public for no reason at all…" Saeki began.

"Saa… can't you see clearly that I'm a girl?" Fuji whined. "I'm hurt, Kojirou!"

"Well, _Syusuke_, since we're on first-name terms, yeah, you're obviously dressed like a girl," Saeki stated the obvious as Fuji sighed.

"Kojirou, you don't get the point!" Fuji pouted. "I'm not just dressed as a girl, I _am_ a girl!"

At this Saeki just stared at her up and down again. It was true, Fuji's frame had obviously become more curved and slimmer, not to mention several other details. But still, this wasn't logic.

"Fuji, you can't become a girl," Saeki said simply. Fuji sighed as she took several steps up to her friend so that the two were less that a foot apart.

"Are you sure? Because Inui's juices does wonders you know," Fuji told him as Saeki examined the girl again. There was no way this was Fuji. Fuji couldn't make everything look so… real.

"But… Fuji… it's illogical!" Saeki finally said as Fuji gripped his shoulders.

"Saeki, you don't know the word logic, remember?" Fuji reminded him as she gave him a good shake. "Besides-"

"Kojirou! Who are you talking to out there?"

Saeki and Fuji froze right then and there as the front door opened, showering the lawn in a warm glow and presenting the two with Saeki's sister. Great… absolutely wonderful.

"Eh… sis… hi!" Saeki supplied lamely as his sister's eyes traveled to Fuji who just stood faintly smiling.

"Oh… was I interrupting something?" she asked, blinking. It was then that Fuji realized that she was still halfway through shaking her friend, thus they were still less than a foot apart and her hands were still on her shoulders. She immediately let go.

"Oh! Not at all! I was just trying to knock some sense into your brother here, right?" Fuji explained.

"Oh, yeah, right!" Saeki agreed. His sister cocked her head to one side and gave Fuji a questioning look.

"You know, you look very familiar…" she noted.

_Great, she recognized me…_ Fuji thought grimly.

"Sis, it's Fuji, remember?" Saeki told her.

_Idiot! Does he know what will happen when people find out!_

"…Oh! That's right!" Saeki's sister exclaimed as it finally clicked. "You must be FujiYuuta! I still remember when you were over here, dressed in that pretty blue dress, but I didn't think it would have been one of your pastimes!"

"Er… right… I think cross-dressing helps me get in tact with my feminine side, so I sometimes do it late at night," Fuji lied. First he was Tezuka's cousin, then he was Yuuta's niece, and now he was Yuuta himself. How interesting…

"Oh…" Saeki's sister nodded. Fuji elbowed Saeki in the ribs.

"OW! Why- oh… yeah…" The look Fuji gave him said it all. "Sis, Yuuta here's having trouble with his brother again, so can he stay for the night?"

"Of course," Saeki's sister said happily. "After all, mom and dad won't be back until tomorrow evening."

"Thanks."

"Okay, explain the whole thing, okay?" Saeki told Fuji as soon as they had made their way up to his room and locked the door and window to prevent Saeki's sister from possibly eavesdropping.

"What's there to explain? I'm a girl. Pretty obvious, isn't it?" Fuji shrugged as she removed some dust from a photo of a seven-year-old Yuuta dressed in a pretty blue dress looking like he was about to kill the eight-year-old Saeki and Fuji, who were trying to apply mascara and lipstick to him.

"Yeah… But there's no way you could've _really_ turned into a girl! That's impossible!" Saeki concluded.

"Do you want proof, Kojirou dear?" Fuji said sarcastically. She had a feeling that she was going to go through a lot of this for the rest of the week.

"What do you mean proof?" Saeki said suspiciously.

"Proof that I'm a girl, Kojirou honey."

Saeki thought over this carefully. Knowing Fuji, nothing was beyond the boy's limits. Actually, Saeki didn't even think that Fuji knew the word 'limit'. And this whole thing didn't sound very appealing to Saeki at all…

"As long as it isn't some crazy or graphical proof," Saeki said slowly. Fuji smirked.

"Oh! Kojirou had a dirty, dirty mind!" Fuji taunted as Saeki rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Here, drink up," Fuji tossed Saeki a vile. Thank Inui for letting Fuji keep the last remaining sample of the juice that contained the Magical Chemical 3.8.

"…What is this?" Saeki asked uncertainly as he shook the vile. The blue liquid did not look very inviting.

"It's what I drank to get into this condition," Fuji explained as she pointed to her chest. "I'm sure after you've tasted this that it'll give you all the proof you need."

"Eh…"

"Oh, Kojirou dearest! Don't tell me you don't want to become a girl for a week!" Fuji laughed.

"Fine! Fine! I believe you!" Saeki finally gave in. "Besides, there's absolutely no way those are fake," he added, pointing towards Fuji's chest. Fuji simply smiled.

"I knew you would understand, Kojirou love!" Fuji squealed as she gave her childhood friend a big hug. Now that was horror: Fuji squealing… and hugging.

"By the way, I never knew you read Jane Eyre. It's actually quite a nice book, but Kojirou dear, don't you think it's a bit too complicated for you?"

_Damn you Fuji… Fujiko… whoever you are.

* * *

_

Two days down, five more to go…

* * *


	7. It's a Date!

* * *

Chapter Seven: It's a Date! (And More Confusion Over Relationships)

* * *

Saeki Kojirou might have been never happier in his life when he finally saw the happy-go-lucky Fuji finally leave the next day. The night was indeed long and exhausting, and he had ended up collapsing in sleep halfway through their prank call to Kajimoto. (Where they got his number, go figure.) Fuji decided to turn in fifteen minutes later when she shoved Saeki out of his bed and throwing him a blanket. Saeki's back still hurt from the hard floor and his lungs were still contaminated from dust seeing that Fuji 'accidentally' threw the blanket over his head. He did have to admit it was fun though, but the comments Fuji was making were giving him creeps and not to mention that any guy would have had his nerves racked if he had a girl in his room two at night leaning over his shoulder to see him write 'I cannot answer this question due to my religious beliefs' on his science homework. (Of course we know he only wrote that because he didn't know the answer and didn't even want to try and get it.) Why he was doing homework only Saeki knew, or not.

…Except there was one not so minor detail that he would've preferred to overlook. It was the fact that he was leaving too… with Fuji… to 'help' buy clothes… which Fuji interpreted as a 'date'.

* * *

"So! Kojirou dear! Where to first?" Fuji laughed in a sinister manner as she linked arms with her childhood friend. Saeki immediately pulled out off Fuji's grasps.

"How am I suppose to know? You dragged me along, _Syusuke_ precious," Saeki pointed out sarcastically as Fuji shrugged.

"But Kojirou love," Fuji teased, "it's only common courtesy that the male of the romantic relationship directs the female on their first date, ne? And use my other name please."

Saeki scowled. If it were like any other time, he would have played along, but now… "We are _not _in a romantic relationship, and we will _never _be, _Fujiko-chan_ dear," the boy stated simply as Fuji smiled.

"I'm kidding! I'm kidding!" Fuji explained as Saeki shook his head. Why was he walking down the street with a psycho girl who is actually suppose to be a boy anyhow? "But really, where to? I don't know this place as well as you do, Saeki."

"Well, it depends on what kind of 'clothes' you want to wear I suppose…"

* * *

Shopping with Fuji Syusuke was torture and hell itself as Saeki remembered, but shopping with Fujiko Suzume… oh man…

"Ne, Kojirou honey, pink or white?" Fuji asked suddenly as Saeki tried to make his way out of the women's clothing isle which Fujiko-chan had dragged him into.

"What?" Saeki asked, confused.

"Color bra. I can't decide. They both look so pretty," Fuji said, trying to suppress a wave of laughter as Saeki tripped and fell.

"_FUJI_!"

"Sorry! Sorry!"

* * *

And that was only the first store. The next one they went to was a photography shop. Saeki almost breathed a sigh of relief, knowing Fujiko couldn't do much harm in a store like this. Key word is _almost_.

"Ne, Kojirou dearest, which?" Fuji asked, her back turned to the boy as she examined two frames.

"Which what?" Saeki said, confused.

"Color. Blue or pink?"

"Blue?" Saeki guessed uncertain.

"I knew it!" Fuji giggled as she skipped to the checkout. Saeki just blinked in confusion as the girl handed the clerk a picture to be fitted inside of the frame. Whatever it was, Saeki had a really bad feeling about it. A _really_ bad feeling about it.

"Here you go, Kojirou!" Fuji said as she handed the boy a brown-wrapped parcel. Saeki hesitantly opened it, stared at it for a couple of seconds, turned a shade to match the frame, and then proceeded to the nearest trashcan to dispose of it.

"…That wasn't very nice, Saeki."

"_FUJI_!"

* * *

"Hey! Ryou, look, it's a picture of you," Atsushi noted as the twins past a trashcan. Ryou looked over in interest as Atsushi gingerly fished a picture of Ryou playing tennis with a blue frame out of the junk. "But why does it say 'I Love My Boyfriend?"

"Huh?" Ryou was quite sure he wasn't anyone's boyfriend. No, he was positive he wasn't.

"You never told me you dated," Atsushi muttered.

"I never did," Ryou assured his twin as he took the frame from his twin and turned it over to reveal the words: To Saeki, because you know it's true. From Fujiko Suzume. Then written in miniscule writing under it, another line of words said: It's a joke, really!

"Fujiko Suzume?" Ryou wondered. He wasn't really phased by it, seeing that Saeki did these stupid things nearly every day.

"She's suppose to me Fuji Yuuta's relative… and Tezuka's cousin," Atsushi explained. "I think she plays tennis too. Met her yesterday."

"I'd like to play her sometimes… but how come you never told me the Tezuka's and Fuji's were related?"

"I never knew."

The twins mused in silence for a while before moving on.

* * *

"Saeki! Saeki! It was only a joke!" Fuji apologized as she ran after the fuming boy. "Saeki!"

"Go away," Saeki said stubbornly, hand making its way into his tennis bag (he had practice after) as he continued to avoid the pleading girl.

"Saeki! Saeki!"

"I said go away!" Saeki growled as his hands clasped around what he was looking for.

"Saeki, I-"

"What's one plus one, Fujiko-chan?" Saeki asked suddenly with a wicked grin to rival that of Fuji's. Fuji just stared at the boy in surprise for a half second, but it was enough for her to hear a click and a see flash of light.

"…_SAEKI_!"

"I'm giving this to everyone I know once it develops."

* * *

But the most frustrating thing that topped all else was this:

"Saeki, come on! There's a store I want to visit still!" Fuji said as she dragged the unwilling Saeki down the streets. It was all too embarrassing in the boy's opinion. They looked like they were the average teenage couple, and Saeki did _not_ like that image at all. By then, they had arrived at their 'destination'.

"Ah! Come on, Saeki! Let's go in!" Fuji said excitedly as she clung to her friend's arm and started jumping up and down like a child. Saeki felt his face turn beet red.

"F-Fuji…! Th-that's… that's… _that's a lingerie store_!"

* * *

After that incident, a few more shops, jokes, and a lot more blackmail gathering for both sides, Saeki and Fuji were finally seated in the most expensive restaurant in Chiba, enjoying lunch outside, courtesy of Fuji (or so she said she would pay). Wait, no, scratch out the 'enjoying' part.

"Kojirou dear, I never knew you were a vegetarian!" Fuji exclaimed as Saeki chocked on his salad.

"I'm not! It's the part of the team menu that says we're suppose to eat more vegetables." Saeki mumbled. Fuji said the most ridiculous things, really.

"Would you like some of Inui's juice then? They have a lot of the needed nutrition in them," Fuji offered. Saeki nervously laughed. If Inui's juices were capable of gender switching, god… he definitely did not want to know what the others did.

"I think I'll-"

"Ryou! There she is! The one who claims to be Fuji Yuuta's niece and Tezuka Kunimitsu's cousin!"

Fuji and Saeki's conversation froze immediately as Atsushi and Ryou spotted the two and came bounding over.

"_You're Tezuka's cousin?_!" Saeki whispered harshly as Fuji irked out a meek smile and shrugged.

"It was an excuse so I wouldn't look like his girlfriend!" Fuji shot back. "And besides, it was Kuni-chan himself who insisted upon it, really!"

"_Kuni-chan?_!" Saeki hissed.

"Don't ask!" Fuji shushed as the Kisarazu twins came up to the two.

"Oh, Saeki, nice to see you again!" Atsushi greeted him.

"Same here," Saeki returned.

"So, you have a twin?" Fuji smiled, inserting herself into the conversation. Ryou turned to examine her for a second or two before Atsushi gave him a little nudge to say something.

"Ah!" Ryou exclaimed. "Sorry, I'm Kisarazu Ryou, older twin of Kisarazu Atsushi, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too," Fuji returned with a smile. By now, the twins had pulled along chairs from empty tables.

"So, leave you for a some time and you get a girlfriend behind our backs?" Atsushi teased as Saeki let out a growl of frustration.

"Do I even need to tell you no?" Saeki spelled out.

"Then what are you doing, having lunch with her?" Ryou asked.

"Eh…"

"Why shouldn't I?" Fuji asked. _Time to pull another one…_ "After all, I'm Kojirou's sister-in-law, right, Kojirou?"

"Sister-in-law?" the twins chorused in surprise.

_Sister-in-law! Are you crazy Fuji! _Saeki thought in irritation. _Oh, wait, it's Fuji, so why am I surprised?_

"You're sister… she got married, Saeki?" Ryou asked, not quite believing it.

"Wait, if your sister got married," Atsushi began, "and she's your sister-in-law," he indicated Fuji, "and Yuuta's niece, then that would mean…"

"…Fuji Syusuke is married to Saeki's sister," Ryou finished for his twin. Then the two digested it.

"…" _Saa… next time you should think about what you're saying before saying it, Syusuke… Oh well, all the more fun!_ Fuji mused in bliss while Saeki began falling apart.

"Yup, that's right!" Fuji said happily as Saeki gave her a 'what do you think you're doing!' look.

"…Wait, that doesn't make any sense!" Atsushi said. "It's impossible for Fuji Syusuke to have a child his age, right?"

No one said anything.

"Right?" Atsushi repeated.

"Oh! Atsushi, I'm going to be late for practice," Ryou told his twin, changing the confusing subject. Hooray for Sunday practices! "Saeki, you should come along too."

"Right," Saeki said quickly as he pulled Ryou out of the door, not wanting to have anything to do with Fuji anymore and thankful for the excuse to get away.

"That Kojirou," Fuji muttered as she too stomped out of the store. Atsushi just sighed. He suddenly felt like the only person who acted his appropriate age of the bunch.

"Ah, sir, here's the caviar ordered," the waiter said curtly as he placed the dish in front of Atsushi and a receipt.

"Caviar? I didn't order-" but the waiter was already gone. Atsushi dared take a peek at the bill. "S-seventeen thousand three-hundred and one yen!" (Waiter: what can I get you two? Saeki: I'll have salad and a glass of water please. Fuji: Um… I'll take this, and the most expensive thing you have!) How was he going to pay for all that! (A/N: That's about a hundred and fifty-seven dollars. I really have no clue if they even have caviar in Japan, but oh well!)

"Why am I the one paying!"

And so poor Atsushi ended up doing dishes for the rest of the day, courtesy of his _wonderful_ friends.

* * *

Meanwhile, having lost Saeki and Ryou, Fuji decided that she had bothered them enough as it is. So what to do now? After all, it was only one thirty and Fuji was still itching for more excitement. (And blackmail of course.)

"Hmm… Seigaku tennis practice starts soon," She noted with a smile. Time to check up on the transferring sheets with her ever so darling (sarcasm intended) captain.

_Wonder how Tezuka will deal with all the rumors Echizen and Momoshiro are probably spreading… _

_

* * *

_


	8. And This Is How The Rumors Go

A/N: I confess, I too am having trouble-keeping tract of Fuji's imaginary family. So when I drew out the family tree, I found mistakes, went back, fixed them. Right.

* * *

Chapter Eight: And This Is How The Rumors Go

* * *

Tezuka Kunimitsu had never bothered himself with rumors. They were, in his opinion, childish and immature, not to mention always untrue. He would just waver it off like nothing, for gossiping about others was very rude and the time could simply be put to better use like practicing tennis or studying or… tennis. However, when our dear Tezuka arrived at tennis practice on a bright sunny Sunday, there was one set of rumors he couldn't toss away just like that. Why? Because these particular rumors was about him. 

"Ah! Tezuka!" Oishi called as Tezuka arrived on court. Everyone immediately dropped whatever he was doing at a terrifying rate and literally charged at the confused and slightly surprised Tezuka.

"Buchou! Everyone's saying you're married!"

"Buchou! Are you really Fuji's nephew?"

"Buchou! Momoshiro's saying you have a kid!"

"Buchou! Echizen says you're Fuji's sister's product of a secret affair!"

"Buchou!

"_Buchou_!"

"BUCHOU!"

Now there was something you definitely didn't see everyday. It was as if everyone had lost all of their manners and mind, as the screaming and rude outbreaks never had occurred in the past. Only a real sly and tricky individual could explain and execute this situation, and Tezuka had a pretty good idea who that person was.

"…Hundred laps, everyone, _now_!" Tezuka yelled, feeling a headache come on. Aspirin never seemed so appealing. "Except Echizen, Momoshiro, Eiji, and Inui. You four come over here."

There were whispers of questions as to why those four were excused from the laps, but no one dared voice their opinions out loud, afraid of getting another hundred laps. However, the people just couldn't resist chatting about the newly risen rumors that were still very much in the hot category.

"Well?" Tezuka said calmly (or as calmly as he could) as he directed his gaze on Momoshiro and Echizen. There was an awkward silence between the two as they glared intensely at each other before finally pointing a finger at one another and chorusing in unison:

"It was all _his_ fault!"

Tezuka restrained himself from sighing and slapping both of them. "Where did you hear those ridiculous things from?"

"Your cousin," said Ryoma.

"Your daughter," said Momoshiro at the exact same time. The two glared at each other again. Tezuka's assumption has been confirmed. Who else could pull this off other that Fuji?

"Two hundred laps, both of you," he muttered, sending the two off. Tezuka turned to Eiji and Inui.

"Where's Fuji?"

"Yeah… right… eh… Fuji is…. Fuji is…" Eiji laughed nervously as he poked together his fingers. To be quite honest, he had no idea where Fuji was. Last he saw her, she was hassling the St. Rudolph people, and she hadn't shown up since. Somehow, Eiji had a really bad feeling about this and an even guiltier conscious for leaving the person alone. It just wasn't safe for Fuji to go unsupervised, really.

"You don't know," Tezuka interpreted, more being like of a statement than a question. Eiji gulped and nodded. Tezuka let out that long held in sigh and rubbed his temple, feeling a headache coming on.

"Sorry," Eiji apologized. "Nya, but last I saw her, she was with her brother and those St. Rudolph people." Tezuka squeezed his eyes shut.

"Yes, I believe it's a good idea to check there as with every other school in the area," Inui noted, closing his notebook where he had previously been jotting down notes. "The possibility of finding Fuji harassing the other players is about eighty-three point five percent."

* * *

And so off the (less that) happy trio went… 

"Eh? Tezuka? Is something wrong?" Tachibana asked as the trio walked up to the Fudomine tennis courts.

"Oh! Tezuka-san! Is it true?" An gasped as she dashed over.

"An, it's not polite to-"

"Kamio heard from Momoshiro that you're actually Fuji's nephew!" An continued on, completely ignoring her brother's signs to stop. By now everyone else on the team had gathered around.

"Are you really Fuji's nephew!"

"Is it true that you're really married!"

"People are saying that you've eloped somewhere!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"Everyone, please stop," Tachibana shushed them. Turning to Tezuka, "I apologize for my team's behavior."

"It's fine," Tezuka returned, though he clearly he was not amused that the rumors had even spread to Fudomine, and at an incredibly alarming speed to.

"Can I help you with anything?"

"Yes. We were wondering if a girl about XXX feet high with light brown hair about XXX inches long and weighs about XXX pounds with a shoe size about-"

"Nya, have you seen that girl that looks a lot like Fuji? The one from the other day?" Eiji cut through before Inui started spurting more random and useless measurements.

"Ah! You mean that girl who stopped my ball from going in!" Kamio raged as he remembered flickers of that day.

"The one who denied being related to Fuji Syusuke even though she was actually his daughter," An added.

"But why would she deny being related to him? Could she be ashamed of having him as a father? I don't blame her. After all, they are around the same age, so if she has his daughter, then… (mumble) so that would mean… (mumble)…"

"Have you seen her?" Tezuka asked bitterly.

"No, I'm sorry," Tachibana apologized. The three just nodded and turned to leave. "By the way, Tezuka, is it true?"

Tezuka resisted the urge to just throw up his hands and scream.

* * *

So after the encounter with Fudomine… 

"Ah! Sengoku-san desu! It's Tezuka-san desu!" Dan gasped as he pointed to the ever stern-looking Tezuka approaching with Eiji and Inui.

"Oh! Lucky! We were just talking about you, Tezuka!" Sengoku laughed. "That Akutsu heard from his friend in Seigaku that you're related to the Fuji family! Are you really?"

"Hey! Everyone! It's Tezuka! Isn't he suppose to have just gotten married?"

"I heard from someone that he already has a daughter!"

"No way! I thought it was suppose to be his cousin!"

"Hey! Tezuka!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"Have you… seen her?" Tezuka said slowly, controlling his voice as he felt a vein throb.

"Yes, we're currently looking for-"

"Tezuka's daughter, or cousin, or… someone, nya!" Eiji smiled.

"Eh? Lost your own daughter/cousin? How unlucky," Sengoku chirped with a goofy grin. "Nope. Haven't seen her yet. Is she cute? And which is it? Is she your daughter or cousin?"

"…Let's go," Tezuka muttered without do much as giving another thought as Sengoku went into a love daze.

* * *

"…What school is this again?" Tezuka blinked. 

"Jyousei Shounan. You were still in Germany when we played them," Inui answered.

"Ah…"

"Oh! Look everyone! It's Tezuka Kunimitsu!" Youhei and Kouhei screamed in unison.

"You mean THE Tezuka Kunimitsu who is Fuji Syusuke's sister's son!"

"I heard somewhere that he has a kid already!"

"No way! I heard that that was his cousin!"

"Cousin? That doesn't matter! I heard he was married!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"Please excuse my teammates," Kajimoto sniffed as he stepped forward. "Do you require anything?"

"Have you seen a girl that's about XXX feet tall and-"

"Tezuka's relative! The girl one, about our age with light brown hair," Eiji interrupted Inui once again.

"No," Kajimoto said. "But is what Mizuki told me all true?"

Tezuka just sighed, turned away, and didn't answer, just like a gentlemen should or shouldn't have done… if that makes any sense…

* * *

"Oh, it's Seigaku," Yuuta muttered as the St. Rudolph tennis club froze. 

"Tezuka! Is it true that Fuji's your uncle!"

"Are you really married!"

"Do you really have a kid!"

"No way! That kid's his cousin! Fuji's kid!"

"Fuji has a kid!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"If you want that weird girl that looks like my brother, and probably is my brother, she's not here," Yuuta sighed. The three didn't need any other signal to run away.

* * *

"AH! TEZUKA-SAN! HOW NICE OF YOU TO COME! WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT YOU!" Kentarou screamed in an absurdly loud voice as the rest of the Rokkaku gasped and started gossiping among themselves. 

"Hey! Isn't Tezuka supposed to married!"

"I heard from someone that he's Fuji's nephew!"

"Well I heard that Fuji is married to Saeki's sister!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"Ah! Tezuka!" Saeki interrupted as he stopped the whole club from clobbering the poor teen. "Did you come to talk about your, eh… _cousin_?"

"Ah," Tezuka nodded.

* * *

"Nya! So after Fuji dragged you on a date,you ditched her and you don't know what happened to her after?" Eiji asked. 

"Nope," Saeki sighed. "But whatever he made," he indicated to Inui, "it was really scary."

"I apologize for her behavior," Tezuka apologized as he gave a small nod.

"Eh, no! It's fine, really!" Saeki returned politely. _Fine? Not really. _

"So, have you no recollection of where she is at the current moment?" Inui inquired as he adjusted his glasses.

"No, sorry. Last I saw her she was in that restaurant," Saeki confessed.

"It's okay," Tezuka said. "Sorry to trouble you."

"Right, right."

* * *

"Hey, Yuushi, isn't that Tezuka?" Gakuto asked as he pointed in the vague direction of the trio. "Oh, and that lame excuse for an acrobatic is here also." 

"Look! It's Tezuka! I heard he got into an affair and had a daughter!"

"Cousin! It's his cousin!"

"But that would mean that Fuji is married!"

"Tezuka!"

"_Tezuka_!"

"TEZUKA!"

"Stop this at once. You're disgracing the school," Atobe said arrogantly as he flashed Tezuka smirk.

"Atobe."

"Tezuka."

"…"

"…"

"Nya, Inui, I feel a bad atmosphere here," Eiji whispered as Inui started jotting down fresh notes about the various Hyoutei players, all whom had gathered around to see the scene play itself out.

"Of course, considering the two's history," Inui shrugged, clearly not disturb by any of it.

"How's your shoulder," Atobe asked tensely.

"It's nearly completely healed," Tezuka replied frigidly.

"…"

"…"

"So, what brings you to Hyoutei, hmm?" Atobe continued on.

"I'm looking for… _her_," Tezuka answered, not daring to address Fuji any other way.

"Ah," Atobe mused. "Well, she hasn't been to Hyoutei yet. Have you tried calling her?"

"…"

"…"

"…"

The three thought the exact same thing: _Why didn't I think of that?_

"Heh? Don't tell me none of you thought of that?" Atobe snickered, followed by the rest of the club. It was pure humiliation I tell you.

"Th-thank you," Tezuka twitched as he withdrew his cell phone.

"Tch. Don't think about it," Atobe replied, cool as ever.

"By the way," Tezuka mumbled. "Can you… do me a favor?"

"Oh? So the great Tezuka Kunimitsu asks for people's help too, eh?"

* * *

"Ah! Tezuka!" Fuji beamed. 

"Fuji, care to tell me about the rumors that are going around?" Tezuka asked, barely containing a long wanted urge to scream.

"Oh, it's nothing," Fuji laughed. "I sort of got carried away, and somehow everything just fell into logical place!"

"…Logical?" Tezuka questioned as a wave of giggles erupted from the other side.

"Sorry, sorry," Fuji said sincerely, or as sincerely as you can get with a scheming mind like hers.

"Don't spread anymore rumors," Tezuka instructed.

"Yes, yes, but you should have told me that earlier," Fuji pouted. "After all, it somehow ended up with the real me splitting with my imaginary wife and now having Inui as my step-father, and-"

"Fuji…"

"Sorry, sorry!"

"By the way, where are you now?" Tezuka asked.

"Hotel. Thought I'd give everyone a break," Fuji told him. Tezuka was relieved that she wasn't at anyone else's house causing utter chaos. After all, he was quite sure he'd be one ending up paying for the damages instead of Fuji.

"Right," Tezuka sighed. "I got your paperwork done as well."

"Really?" Fuji smiled.

"You'll be reporting to Hyoutei tomorrow morning at six thirty sharp."

"Oh, that's- what?"

"I said you'll be reporting to Hyoutei tomorrow morning at six thirty sharp. Good bye."

"Wait! Tezuka! Tezuka? Hello? Tezuka?" But the phone was already dead.

* * *

Three days down, four more to go…

* * *


	9. Finacé 'n Fiancée

* * *

Chapter Eight: Fiancé n' Fiancée

* * *

"Wait! Tezuka! Tezuka? Hello? Tezuka?" 

For the first time since Fuji had acquired her… new form, the brunette frowned as she stared at her cell phone with discontent. She did not hear what Tezuka had just told her, has she? Hyoutei, of all the places! Didn't she specify… no, wait; she never did specify what school she wanted to go to, did she?

Fuji sighed as a bitter smile formed on her lips. Though it would have been fun to tor- mingle with her friends at Seigaku, there _was_ always the chance that her cover would be blown. So in a way, it was probably best this way, wasn't it? Besides, she could dig up a lot more black- information from them, couldn't she?

The bitter smile turned into a sadistic smirk as the endless possibilities filled her mind. Oh yes, someone was going to feel very sorry about having agreed to let her into Hyoutei. Very, very sorry indeed. Can't you just taste the disaster about to come?

* * *

Atobe sniffed as he recalled the 'favor' Tezuka had asked him to do over a cup of tea after he had made a phone call to his _cousin_. It was rather an odd one, but more than that, Tezuka was the one asking him… _him_. No need to say that it was surprising, but even more so… since when did Tezuka _really _have a cousin? (He thought it was just rumors after all. I mean, there was no way Tezuka could've been a dad, could he have?) One that plays tennis no less. Why didn't Tezuka just apply the person for Seigaku? Why did he want his cousin to come to Hyoutei? And why did he tell his so-called cousin of the situation before he had even confirmed it with him? So many questions… And his intuition said that he did _not_ want to find out the answers.

* * *

So on Monday morning… 

"Who's that?"

"I think she's new."

"Really? A person coming in at this time of the year?"

Fuji sighed at the ridiculous gossip about her as she happily walked towards the principal's office, awaiting the long and monotonous speech about achieving your best, do not bully others, etc. It seems that some students were already roaming around in the school even in the early mornings. Not that it bothered Fuji, because sooner or later everyone would know she existed, but it was just the stares of disapproval and glares that clearly says 'you're not welcome here' that were a bit unnerving. Oh well, Fuji never did expect everyone here to be that nice and courteous.

"Ah! Fujiko-san, how nice of you to come _five minutes late_," the principal greeted her with a haughty voice.

_Saa… even the guy in charge is so temperamental._

"Be more punctual next time, sit down." He motioned towards a single wooden chair in the center of his office directly in front of his desk. It felt as if Fuji was in some sort of court, the object of attention.

"So…" The words that were strung next went into one ear and went out the next. Fuji didn't really have much a mind to pay attention to useless babbles, especially so early in the morning. Her eyes, which she had previously forced to stay glued to the man to prove she was somewhat paying attention had eventually given up and was scanning the room with mild amusement.

"…And here's your school uniform, books, etcetera," the principal grumbled as he suddenly dumped a bunch of things into the surprised Fuji's hands. "Class starts in fifteen minutes, so hurry up and _don't_ be late."

* * *

So after being oh so rudely shoved out of the principal's office and hastily changing into her uniform, Fuji somehow managed to find her way to class with nine minutes to spare. The class immediately silenced as they saw an unfamiliar face peep through the door. As Fuji predicted, they showed no signs of welcome, only staring (and some glaring) at the girl as she placed herself in the only empty desk. Inwardly, she smirked. They had no idea what they were dealing with, really. 

"Class, as you can see, we have a new student. Please stand up and introduce yourself," the teacher instructed curtly as Fuji obliged. The class once more gazed at the seemingly shy and frigid girl as she stood.

"Fujiko Suzume," she said simply, not having much heart to say anything else after that immensely boring speech by the principal.

For the rest of math class, Fuji plotted because obviously, Fuji already knew everything being taught. She plotted on how she could squeeze out information from the Hyoutei regulars (just because everyone else is not really as important of a subject), she plotted how to make them tumble down the road of being crushed by humiliation and rage (because she _was_ Fuji and all), she plotted how she would logically expand her illogical family tree (just because it was so much fun), and last but not least, she plotted on how she would eventually get revenge on her snotty classmates who kept throwing crumpled pieces of paper at her head whenever the teacher wasn't looking (well, it speaks for itself).

_Thrak!_ There's another paper ball.

_Thrak!_ And another one.

_Thrak!_ Yup, must be some sort of initiation to those who are new.

_Thrak!_ Okay, this was getting really old and annoying.

_Thrak!_

Almost all of those who had been snickering at seeing crumpled paper balls bounce off of Fuji's head immediately silenced as Fuji's gracefully and swiftly dodged the coming paper ball without so much as batting an eye, and watched it go _Thrak!_ on the unfortunate person in front of her: the one and only Atobe Keigo.

The boy swung around with a death glare made to kill. I mean, how DARE anyone ruin his perfect hair? But the glare quickly resided once he caught sight of Fuji with her eyes flickered open, giving him a leisure wave and a sadistic smile. Realization had taken hold.

_And so the game begins…

* * *

_

It wasn't until lunch that Atobe had mentioned anything about… you know… But unfortunately, even if he didn't bring up the subject, his teammates wasted no time doing so.

"Hey, Atobe, isn't that girl new to your class?" Shishido pointed out as the Hyoutei regulars sat down to have lunch under the shade of a large tree.

"Why would you care?" Atobe sneered. "Right, Kabaji?"

"Usu."

"I'm just asking. What's been biting you?" Shishido returned as he began shoving things into his mouth.

"Eh, Shishido-san, you shouldn't eat so fast. You might choke," The ever so polite and nice Ohtori advised. Shishido just rolled his eyes and started eating slower like he was told.

"Hey, doesn't she look familiar somehow?" Gakuto mused with a frown as he observed the girl in the distance. "I could've sworn I saw her before…"

"Maybe she was a victim to your temper," Oshitari suggested with a smirk. "You do have a tendency to torment those who tick you off."

"Shut up," Gakuto huffed.

"But you do have a point, Gakuto," Oshitari said. "She does seem familiar in a way."

"Why are we discussing a girl?" Hiyoshi asked with a sigh. Of course, no one heard him, so therefore the boy just rolled his eyes and went back to his lunch.

"Oh, I'm sure Atobe will explain everything, right?" Shishido shrugged.

"Figure it out for yourselves," Atobe snapped.

And Jirou slept on…

* * *

"Tezuka!" Atobe hissed. He was hidden away in a corner right before tennis practice began, making a phone call he has been dying to make ever since that… _girl_ showed up in class. "_Explain!_" 

"You know, I said the exact same thing," Tezuka replied bitterly.

"_Why_ is your teammate a… a…"

"A girl?" Tezuka supplied.

"Don't cut me off!" Atobe snapped back haughtily.

"My other teammate developed something in his lab, and Fuji just happened to be the unfortunate test subject," Tezuka replied calmly. "She should be back to normal in four days or so, so until then, thank you for taking care of her."

"…Tezuka!"

"Good-bye."

Atobe just glared at his cell phone as Tezuka hung up.

* * *

Tennis practice, luckily, had gone by with no interruptions. No one mentioned anything about Fuji. Unluckily, however, the girl was waiting for the regulars in front of the school gates after practice. 

"Ah! Kei-chan!"

Atobe twitched at how leisurely the name was called. His teammates, who were exiting with him, started snickering. To them, it must have been an overly obsessive fan girl who had forgotten rule number sixteen in to 'The Official Atobe-sama Fan Club': Do not harass Atobe-sama when his glory is exiting school grounds from tennis practice.

"What do you want?" Atobe snapped as the girl hopped over with a devilish grin.

"I just wanted to say hello and mingle," Fuji said happily as the other regulars started looking at her in a queer way. They knew that some of the girls in the fan club were brave and straightforward, but it was never so much like this. "Is that okay, Kei-chan?"

"…Do whatever you want," Atobe finally said after considering his options and consequences.

"Atobe, you seem extra fond of her. Care to tell why you don't just blow her off with a smirk like you always do?" Shishido taunted as Atobe flashed him a glare.

"Oh really?" Fuji replied pleasantly with a sick smile.

"Who are you anyways?" Gakuto asked suspiciously. "You seem familiar somehow…"

"Do I?" Fuji replied, secretly hinting at sarcasm. "I'm Tezuka Kunimitsu's cousin, but people tell us we don't look that much alike."

Silence…

"So the rumors are true!"

"Are you really Tezuka's cousin!"

"Why are you here at Hyoutei then!"

"Is Tezuka really married!"

"Does he have a daughter!"

"Who's his wife!"

For a while, the questions kept pouring in as Fuji secretly smiled in triumph. People are just so gullible these days, honestly! She never really though anyone would be fooled by her looks and such things, let alone the Hyoutei regulars, whom she thought would at least have _some_ common sense at least.

"Well, seeing that Kei-chan and I are engaged to be married next spring, our parents thought it'd be better if we'd could be near each other, right darling?" Fuji said without missing a beat. Atobe, meanwhile, could've skipped four.

More silence…

…And then all hell broke loose.

* * *

Fuji was still rolling in laughter once she flopped down on one of Atobe's super expensive couches. She knew she could lie and spin far-fetched quite well, but she had never imagined she could do it _this_ well. The scene the two had left was total hysteria, filled with mass confusion, looks of disbelief, and of course, utter chaos. Fuji was so glad she had brought her digital camera. 

"Will you _stop_ it?" Atobe snapped impatiently as he ordered one of his maids to bring tea. "And _why_ are you here at my place!"

"Because I'm staying over," Fuji beamed as she flipped the pictures she had taken so far on her camera. "And if you say no, I'll be tacking these all around the school tomorrow." With a smirk, Fuji reached into her bag and withdrew a photograph, and then another and another. Atobe grew paler with each.

"…_How_ did you get pictures of me _sleeping_!" Atobe shrieked as he lunged at them. Fuji just laughed as stuffed them back into her bag.

"I have pictures of everyone sleeping," Fuji told him calmly. "And all their baby pictures and much, _much_ more."

Atobe's eyes widened as Fuji went back to rummaging her bag, occasionally pulling out something and humming a happy tune. He had always known that Fuji Syusuke was fearful on the court, but he had no idea how absolutely _terrifying_ she could be in everyday life. Suddenly, privacy didn't seem to exist. Not with her around anyhow. Atobe just shivered to think what other pictures Fuji had in that collection of hers.

He had a feeling that he was most definitely not going to enjoy her company, and even more so the new rumors that will surely spread like wild fire.

* * *

Four days down, three days to go…

* * *

-X- 

The stuff below is useless, pointless, plotless, and completely out of character omakes because I felt that this chapter was stupid and not nearly long enough.

* * *

Omake: And Tezuka Reacts

* * *

"Buchou! Buchou!" Momoshiro cried as he spied the stoic walking down the street. Dragging the reluctant Ryoma to where he was, Momoshiro exclaimed. "Buchou! You never told us that Atobe was your wife!" 

"…_Excuse me_?"

"No! Atobe's engaged to Tezuka-buchou's cousin!" Ryoma insisted. "And does that monkey king look like a girl to you?"

"He acts like one."

"…A hundred laps, both of you."

* * *

Omake: The Origin of The Magical Chemical 3.8

* * *

"Ne, Yanagi-sempai, what is that?" Kirihara inquired as he poked at a glass test tube. 

"Don't touch that!" Yanagi informed as Kirihara quickly withdrew his hand. "It's a chemical that will make you turn into a girl if you drink it! It's very dangerous!"

"…Then why are you making them?" Kirihara asked.

"Because I want the power to be able to rule the twenty-third pair of human chromosomes."

"…Okay…"

* * *

Omake: Click… Click… FLASH!

* * *

Sometimes when he was sleeping, Jirou would suddenly be pulled from his dreamland filled with cotton candy clouds and fountains filled with grape Ponta into a world where little cameras would pop out from cookie bushes shouting, "Click… Click… FLASH!" 

And then all of a suddenly, the dream would disappear and Jirou would find himself waking up.

"Hmm… what a weird dream…" he would remark, and then he'd fall asleep again. The funny little cameras would then return.

"Click… Click… FLASH!"

Of course, Jirou, and many other people who have had similar dreams, never would have guessed that Fuji Syusuke was perched on a tree outside of their houses taking pictures to sell to the fan girls online over eBay (do not own). How scary…


	10. Of Purple Shirts and Many More

* * *

Chapter Ten: Of Purple Shirts and Many More

* * *

The night with Fuji was… how should we put it… Interesting wasn't intense enough… Hateful just didn't measure up to the standards… Maybe three million sixty-six thousand four hundred fifty eight dollars and twenty-seven cents wasted away might have been a good way to describe the tip of the iceberg. 

After endless pesters of who that girl was from his servants and an absolutely 'pleasant' dinner filled with Fuji's sly remarks and poking at everything demanding to know if it were edible and not poisoned, the girl proceeded to 'accidentally' knock over an antique vase when 'examining' it, topple over several more valuable items just for good measures, slide into Atobe's room when he was taking a shower and snitched endless photographs, some articles of clothing, (because they looked expensive probably worth a lot) and among many other little things, and by the time the boy had returned, she was labeling a sticky note on the items called 'Atobe's Personal Blackmail Material'. Atobe was not pleased.

However, what was _really_ annoying was the phone calls he had been getting, which usually were along the lines of:

"Atobe! You're getting married!"

"Atobe! You're going to be related to Tezuka!"

"ATOBE-SAMA! DON'T MARRY HER! I… I LOVE YOU!" (of course, you know this is the president of The Official Atobe-Sama Fan Club)

"Atobe! Are you really engaged to Tezuka's cousin!"

"Atobe! Do you already have a kid!"

And so on and on it went, though where the kid part came up he could only guess. But that wasn't really important. The important fact was that his reputation was ruined. _RUINED_! All in one day's time! And these people were dumb enough to actually believe it! It was just scandalous! It was irony! It was… Fuji! Atobe made a mental note to crush the girl once she was a he again.

But the real problem was that she was going to be at Hyoutei for the rest of the week… or was she? Hmm…

Atobe sighed as he grabbed his rarely used phone book and the nearest phone. Someone was going to be sorry, but it wasn't going to be him.

* * *

"… I'm going to St. Rudolph?" The brunette blinked at the rich boy told her the news with a smirk. "Since when did you have any correspondence with them?" 

"Since yesterday," Atobe informed her as he dumped her things in her arms. "Because I will not tolerate you tainting my reputation anymore than you've already had."

"Really? And I thought you and that what's-his-name guy were just exchanging purple shirts," Fuji shrugged. "You had quite the collection in your closet. They were the only things I didn't touch because it was just so _contaminated_."

"They are _not_ purple!" Atobe insisted as he wrenched open the front door. "They're-"

But the boy's words were lost in a sea of screams and flashes that had gathered in front of his door, all shouting things like:

"Atobe! Look over here!"

"Atobe! Smile at the camera!"

"Atobe! We would like to get your opinion on your current engagement!"

"Atobe! Would you introduce your fiancée to us?"

"Atobe! Could you tell us when the wedding will be?"

"Atobe!"

"Atobe!"

"Atobe!"

Usually, the boy would be flattered and proud of so many people chanting his name, but in this case, it was just like murder. This had happened a few times before like when he became captain of the Hyoutei tennis club and a lot of tennis magazine reporters had come to interview him, and when his father's company had acquired major fortunes and he was asked how life felt as the son of a company CEO and so and so… But this was just ridiculous! (Thank goodness his parents were overseas.) And even more so, Fuji was enjoying every moment of it!

"Ne, don't be shy about it, _Kei-chan_," Fuji giggled as she linked arms with the reluctant Atobe, who was absolutely mortified as the crowd gave a huge cheer and photographers were starting to snap away like no tomorrow. His eyes quickly scanned the crowd, and found his teammates all huddled in a corner laughing, some people from other schools, and surprisingly enough, Eiji, Inui… and Tezuka, who, it appeared, was _smirking_. Oh, where has the sanity gone!

* * *

"…No way…" 

"… I refuse to believe this is happening…"

"… She's gotten cuter, da ne…"

Fuji happily skipped into class as her fellow third years (which oddly contained all of the third year St. Rudolph regulars for some strange reason) stared at her with interest. A handful however, stared at her with fear and disbelief. (You can guess who they are, no?)

"Hello my dear classmates!" she began over enthusiastically with a side dish of sarcasm and sadisticness, which isn't even a word, but that's not important. "I am Fujiko Suzume, Tezuka Kunimitsu's cousin, Fuji Yuuta's niece, Fuji Syusuke's daughter, and Atobe Keigo's wife to be. Nice to meet you."

_Saa… They're all going to be pretty stupid if they believe that…_

"Oh my god! I saw you live on the news today with Atobe!"

"So Fuji Yuuta really does have a niece!"

"I can't believe Fuji Syusuke actually has a daughter!"

"Fujiko-chan!"

"_Fujiko-chan_!"

"FUJIKO-CHAN!"

_… I had no idea how gullible this world is… Must get mother and father to pull Yuuta out of this school before his mind gets corrupted..._

_

* * *

_

The day passed a lot better than it had at Hyoutei. Well, maybe not, because everyone was ignoring the teacher and just simply staring at Fuji, but she didn't mind that much. However, when lunch came around…

"…Y-You there! Halt!" Mizuki demanded as Yuuta just sighed at how absolutely ridiculous his sempai was acting. Why was he dragged along too? "I demand to you to confirm the rumors to me!"

Fuji blinked for a second, putting on a face to seem as if she was trying to recall who the person was, smiled, and frolicked over to…

"Uncle Yuuta!" she exclaimed as she glomped the unfortunate boy, who yelped as he tried to free himself from what he imagined must have been the chains of death. "I had no idea I would find you here too!"

"Eh…"

"As I was _saying_," Mizuki huffed impatiently. "I am the great Mizuki Haji-"

"And little red ribbon boy and the ugly duckling are here too!" Fuji went on as she hauled Yuuta over to where Atsushi and Yanagisawa, (anywhere but near Mizuki)who were observing the scene with lunch spread out before them, just because they're such good friends and Atsushi's the only one who can consul (and actually tolerate to some extant) Yanagisawa, who constantly complains about not being liked by girls despite his dashingly good looks that "far exceeds Hyoutei's Atobe himself da ne".

"Pay attention to me, will you! Who do you think it was that got you into this school!" Mizuki said in a dangerously low voice as he clasped a hand onto Fuji's shoulder, pried her off of Yuuta, and turned her around to look at him.

"Oh, and who might you be?" Fuji asked obliviously. "Have I met you before?"

"MI-ZU-KI," Mizuki emphasized. "Say it!"

"ME-TU-LI?" Fuji said in the same tone.

"No!" Mizuki screamed as he let out an exasperated sigh. "You met me the other day at the street tennis courts, _remember_?"

"Hmm…" Fuji started as she placed a finger on her cheek. "Nope. Don't remember."

"…!"

* * *

Tennis practice wasn't exactly any better… 

"Ne! Fujiko-chan da ne! Do you want me to give you lessons, da ne?" Yanagisawa called as Fuji observed from the sidelines. Fuji just smiled and waved, but said nothing.

"I think she likes me da ne…" Yanagisawa sighed dreamily.

"Right…" Atsushi answered, too nice to say: "You wish."

"Just serve the ball!" Mizuki screeched. "I haven't got all day to wait around for you guys! And just because Akazawa captain isn't here doesn't mean we can slack off!"

"But I wonder just who exactly is actually in charge around here," Yuuta mumbled.

"Did you say something, Yuuta?" Mizuki asked in a sickening sweet voice.

"No, nothing at-"

"Uncle Yuuta! Why are you engaged in a conversation with that… _thing_?" Fuji demanded as she skittered onto the court with a forced smile.

"For the last time, I am _not_ your uncle!" Yuuta screamed as he threw down his racket and started ranting.

"I'm serving the ball," Atsushi randomly announced, slightly annoyed that he was being ignored.

"I don't think they can hear you da ne," Yanagisawa pointed out as Atsushi's ball went in with zero attention paid to it.

"But uncle Yuuta! Of course you're my uncle!" Fuji insisted. "I mean, why wouldn't you be if I'm your brother's child?"

"My brother does _not_ have a kid!" Yuuta said in frustration.

"Of course he doesn't," Mizuki said comfortingly as he placed a reassuring hand on Yuuta's shoulder. "Fuji Syusuke is far too hideous to attract any type of woman towards him."

"_Excuse me_. Please get your filthy hands off of my uncle, _Thing_," Fuji hissed.

"Why should I?" Mizuki snapped.

Yuuta sighed as he watched the two glare at each other. Oh yes, it was just an absolutely _wonderful_ relationship between the two, just like the one between Mizuki and his brother. His brother… now that he thought about it, the two really were… Yuuta shook his head. There was no way she could be his brother. I mean, the word she just said it all, and there was absolutely no way his brother had a kid. Right? Right…?

"I _said_ I'm serving the ball!" Atsushi frowned as he served again. This time, it was all but ignored.

Mizuki had been in the middle of a very heated verbal fight with Fuji, and was waving around his racket like a madman to emphasize his incoherent words when Atsushi's ball made contact with it. Of course, since he was whacking around like an absurd idiot, (no offense to Mizuki of course) the ball flew clean off of his racket right into a random first year, who was knocked into a ball cart, sending balls all over the place, many of which ricocheted off of everywhere, bonking everyone on the head, and even some random guy who so obviously did not have a good grip on his racket as it was sent flying, eventually going _THRAK_ of Fuji's head. Fuji was NOT amused.

There was silence… and then…

"Let's go, Metuli-san," Fuji mustered out with a bitter smile and her eyes flashed open for a spilt second. Grabbing his wrist, the girl literally dragged him across the court to the exits with everyone looking on. Naturally, Fuji didn't really mind and coulf care less.

"Wha-? Let go of me!" Mizuki demanded. "Do you know who you're dealing with?"

"I know perfectly well what I'm dealing with. It's a thing which alienates uncle Yuuta from his family and has the most horrible fashion sense imaginable in this century," Fuji said with a biting edge of sarcasm. Snickers emerged on the court.

"Where are you taking me!" Mizuki snapped.

"But Metuli-san! You just asked me out on a date!" Fuji pouted. The crowd gasped, for they all knew that Fuji was suppose to be with Atobe.

_A date to make you scream and cry for sanity that is._

"_What_!"

"Oh, Metuli-san! You're so brave, asking me out despite the fact that you know I'm already engaged! I commend you for you courage and will gladly accept your offer to have dinner together for just this one time only," Fuji gushed out dramatically without so much as flinching at her own words. (Though she thoroughly detested them no less.) The crowd broke into hysterical chattering, all except for Yuuta, who just sighed. Now he understood everything.

"What are you up to this time, aniki?" he sighed.

* * *

"Now, now, Metuli-san," Fuji hissed as she dragged him out of school grounds. "Don't be such a pain." 

"What are you-? Who are-"

"I'm so sad that _Mizuki-chan_ doesn't remember me," Fuji smirked, saying the boy's name with as much hatred and emphasize as possible. Her eyes opened once again as she sent a death-piercing glare at him. Mizuki paled.

"Y-You…! Y-You…! …!" Mizuki gasped as he ripped his wrist away from the girl and immediately backed away. "H-How…! Wh-why…!"

"Really now, I expected you of all people to not have such a traumatizing realization," Fuji sighed. Then she smiled again. "So! Now that we're here and all, let's go on a date!"

_Also known as hell and back for you. _

Mizuki just stared at her, jaw opened. "H-How can you say that with no hesitation at all! And _why_ are you a girl!"

"Oh, _Mizuki-chan_, I'm flattered," Fuji said sarcastically. "I can't believe you've finally realized I'm female."

"… I knew it! Fuji Syusuke has been denying his- _her_womanhood all along!"

Fuji twitched.

Oh yes, someone was going to be very, very, _very_ sorry.


	11. Telephone Bills From Hell

* * *

Chapter Eleven: Telephone Bills from Hell

* * *

The date… well, if we were to have asked Mizuki, he would have described it as 'to hell and back', just as Fuji had promised. Let's get into _too_ much detail, for the events that have occurred were just too horrific and terrible to even whisper about. Let's just say that when Yuuta knocked on Mizuki's door…

"Mizuki-san?" the teen called, knocking again, harder this time, when there was no answer. "Mizuki-san, are you okay?"

"W-W-W-Who i-i-i-is i-i-i-it-t-t-t…?" came Mizuki's stuttering voice, so unlike his usually calm and high-strung one.

"It's Yuuta," Yuuta sighed. From within the room, there was a sudden din of clattering and clashing before Mizuki's terrified voice could be heard:

"N-N-N-No! P-Please! D-D-D-Don't k-k-kill m-me! I-I-I h-h-hav-ven't d-d-done a-a-anyth-th-thing w-w-wrong!"

Yuuta rolled his eyes. His brother was truly scary, truly. To think he- _she_ could even have changed the unchangeable Mizuki into a squeaking stammering mouse was just… unbelievable. No, not unbelievable. It was straight out _scary_.

"Mizuki-san, no one's going to kill you," Yuuta insisted.

"N-N-No…! P-Please g-g-go aw-w-way!" Mizuki wailed. "O-O-Or e-e-else m-m-m-master w-will… m-m-m-master w-w-w-will… k-k-k-k-i-i-i… k-k-k-k… k-k-k-k…"

Yuuta stared at the door. Forget scary. The day Mizuki called his brother 'master' (which, apparently, was today) can only be described as _horrifically terrorizing_. Somehow, the thought of his brother in a devil costume with fanged teeth wielding a whip and laughing evilly with Mizuki petrified in a little mouse costume whimpering at his feet just didn't… just didn't calculate.

The boy sighed and turned away, not wanting to try and reason with his sempai anymore. But honestly. He _really_ needed to talk to his brother… eh, sister.

* * *

Fuji, meanwhile, was receiving a lecture on the phone from Tezuka about life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness, and of course…

"Fuji," Tezuka sighed as he rubbed his temple and closed his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Tezuka, I am," Fuji insisted, but she couldn't help smiling. "But I couldn't help it, and as I recall, you-"

Their conversation was interrupted with an abrupt beep.

"Atobe's on the other line," Tezuka muttered as he put Fuji on hold. A couple seconds later, the two of them came on again.

"… and I _demand_-"

"Kei-chan? Have you heard the rumors?" Fuji laughed evilly. She could just picture the teen pale at the sound of her voice, which might as well be that of the devil's advocate.

"…_You_…!" Atobe screamed. "Tezuka, _why_ is…!"

"If you had complaints, Atobe, you might as well let her hear it too," Tezuka said in total deadpan, though you might have picked up some hints of gloating in there if you really tried.

"Oh, complaints? What kind of-"

But once again, another beep interrupted the threesome's conversation.

"Ah, it's Yuuta, let me put him on," Fuji said happily.

"Aniki, _why _is Mizuki suddenly acting like a traumatized mouse?" Yuuta sighed. "And _WHY _is he calling _you_ his master?"

"Mizuki?" Tezuka asked with an air of confusion.

"Oh, right," Atobe replied leisurely. "I couldn't have your teammate tainting my reputation anymore, so I sent her somewhere else."

"…Wait, who are they?" Yuuta asked.

"My friends from the forest," Fuji replied with a giggle.

"Right… Maybe I should call you back, Aniki, after you three-"

BEEP!

"It's Inui," Tezuka said emotionlessly.

"Put him on!" Fuji cheered.

"No, don't put him on, we don't need anymore-"

"Ah, Tezuka," Inui began. "And there's an ninety seven percent chance that Fuji is on this line too, and a seventy-nine percent chance that Atobe is on this line as well, and a forty-two percent chance that Fuji's younger brother is here as well."

"Yuuta!" Yuuta hollered. "It's Y-U-U-T-A Yuuta! Not Fuji's younger brother! Someone get it right?"

"There was a hundred percent chance that you would have said that," Inui noted. "Anyway, Tezuka, Echizen and Momoshiro are-"

BEEP!

"_Why_ are there so many interruptions!" Atobe growled, clearly agitated and stressed. After all, he was locked up in his room, lights off, curtains shut, and a huge uproar of people outside. Who wouldn't be stressed?

"BUCHOU! This is Momoshiro with Echizen and-"

"Momo-sempai… don't be so loud."

"You're cousin's marrying Atobe!"

"… Okay, I'm hanging up," Yuuta declared as he exited himself from the call.

"Hey, who was that?" Momoshiro called obliviously.

"… and then there was a sixty-four percent…"

"… just shut up and…"

"… joy of blackmail…"

BEEP!

"… percent chance that Eiji will…"

"… phone bill and the stupid media…"

"… so much fun…"

"Hoi! Everyone, be quiet for a _second_, nya!"

All the lines immediately silenced as Eiji poked into the conversation. It seemed that there was just more and more and more people coming in and-

BEEP!

"Atobe, have you noticed how your fiancée strangely resembles-"

"Nya, who are you?" Eiji demanded. The uproar began again.

"… Oshitari, she does…"

"… don't understand, Echizen…"

"… is mada mada dane…"

"… chance that Yamabuki…"

"… camera film…"

"… gone, nya!"

"… know she is Fuji Syusuke…"

"… _DESTROYED_ my reputation…"

"… hungry, Echizen…"

"… eat, mada mada dane…"

"… ninety-seven percent that Rikkai will…"

"… pink dress, Tezuka…"

"… toothpaste, nya!

"… marrying her…"

"… Everyone, be quiet!"

There was silence once more as Tezuka's slightly agitated voice effectively shut their mouths' up.

"Can everyone who was not involved with the original conversation please-"

BEEP!

"Momoshiro-kun? It's An. I was wondering if you could come over here for a bit. Kamio-kun is-"

BEEP!

"MOMOSHIRO! I WANT YOU DOWN HERE _NOW_! SO I CAN CRUSH YOU AND-"

BEEP!

"Fuji, it's Saeki. Little Yuuta here is-"

BEEP!

"Echizen-kun desu! It's horrible desu! Akutsu-sempai is-"

BEEP!

"Kamio. I think everyone hates me. I was walking down this street when this old lady dropped her purse, and when I tried to pick it up, her son told me to back off and I was only trying to help and all and then-"

BEEP!

"Dan-kun! It's Minami! You better come down to the courts now because Akutsu is having another-"

BEEP!

"Ah, Sadaharu. I just saw the latest news in the media and it is my guess that you-"

BEEP!

"Yanagi-sempai! Can you _please_ tell Niou-sempai to stop burning-"

BEEP!

"Yuushi! _WHY_ aren't you here yet! We've been waiting for forever, and if you see Atobe, tell him to-"

BEEP!

"An, if you're randomly calling people again for-"

BEEP!

"Kirihara! I just burned your-"

BEEP!

"Saeki, it's Atsushi. I want to talk about that bill-"

BEEP!

"Atsushi da ne! Mizuki is in-"

BEEP!

"Atobe! Did you see my stuffed-"

BEEP!

"Jirou? I just wanted to let you know you left your-"

BEEP!

"Marui, it's Jackal. Sanada said-"

BEEP!

"Oh! I'm so unlucky! Akutsu is-"

BEEP!

"YOU #$! I'LL KILL-"

BEEP!

"Atsushi it's Ryou, and about that-"

BEEP!

"Niou, stop starting bonfires in the-"

BEEP!

"Aniki, I called back because Mizuki is-"

BEEP!

"Yanagi, why is my-"

BEEP!

"Sanada? Is everything all-"

BEEP!

"Yuuta, do you know why Mizuki is-"

BEEP!

"Eiji, did something happen? Everyone is-"

BEEP!

"Tachibana-san, it's Ishida and I-"

BEEP!

"This is Kajimoto and-"

BEEP!

"Kajimoto! Tell those two little twin brats to-"

BEEP!

"Uh… Um… R-Ryoma-kun… I…"

BEEP!

"Sakuno! Did you call him yet? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did you? Did-"

"_Everyone who isn't part of the original conversation please hang up, now_!" It was one of those few times when Tezuka was just truly scary, and everyone just couldn't help but obey due to fear of his wrath. So the less that pleasant phone relay was put to a-

BEEP!

"Yo! Osakada! How dare you insult my two years of sewing-"

"_NOW_!"

* * *

Tezuka, Fuji, and Atobe never did quite finish their telephone conversation. Atobe had hung up after sliding in a few insults at the two, and Tezuka left saying something about telephone bill. Fuji hung up soon after.

"Saa… That went well, didn't it, _Mizuki-chan_?"

"Y-y-y-y-yes …. M-m-m-m-master…"

"Now, about that purple miniskirt you're going to wear on Thursday…"

And hell froze over.


	12. Unlucky!

A/N: Ah… my apologies for the out of characterness. I really didn't mean for that to happen. And now that I got that nagging thing out of my system, enjoy this random filler chapter.

* * *

Chapter Twelve: Unlucky!

* * *

Now that Fuji had successfully made hell break loose and make hell freeze over, we can probably assume she's near invincible. Having half a brain and maybe some more, Mizuki obviously knew this, but was too afraid to act upon it naturally, still in stuttering and reserved mode. Yuuta, however, finally got fed up with the mass chaos his brother- _sister_ was causing, and fearing the well-being of his teammates and their sanity, he made a few calls, and was about to happily get into bed for a well deserved rest when his cell phone suddenly rang.

"Yuuta." Yuuta squeezed his eyes closed as he realized that that voice belonged to none other that his _sister_. "Are you mad?" It sounded as if Fuji was almost remorseful and sad in a way, something Yuuta wasn't usually used to hearing.

"Yes," Yuuta answered, showing now signs of softening up or sympathy. After all, how any times was he explicated to his _sister's_ schemes?

"I'm sorry," the voice replied, sounding, well, very sad. Yuuta bought none of it. "I suppose I'll not be coming back to your school tomorrow, right? But knowing you, Yuuta, you've already made arrangements, haven't you?"

"Yeah," Yuuta answered again. "You can go terrorize Yamabuki tomorrow, and maybe Rikkai the next. I don't know."

"Hmm… perhaps I will. Thank you Yuuta. I knew you'd come through. I was about to make calls myself, but the phone bill these days are so _expensive_," Fuji sighed, smiling. On the other line, Yuuta huffed; knowing that everything he had done was exactly what his _sister_ had predicted.

"Then why are you calling me?" Yuuta asked suspiciously.

"Because I know my dear little brother would kindly pay the phone bill for me."

"Wait –CLICK— … Aniki…" Yuuta sighed as he slapped his cell phone back and flopped onto his bed. Oh well. At least it wasn't _him_ dealing with the terror. And it was only a three-minute call, right? How much can that cost? (That is until he got the phone bill the next day and his eyes literally turned into goo as the sight of all those zeros. Must have been that massive chain call yesterday. Poor Yuuta was now broke and in dept.)

* * *

"Well, that went along well, didn't it, Echizen?" Fuji asked as she hung up.

"Tch…"

* * *

Actually, Ryoma wasn't all that surprised to learn that the girl who claimed to be Tezuka's cousin, that guy's (who he defeated) niece, Atobe's fiancée, and among many other things to actually be Fuji. He had had a sneaking suspicion ever since that match he had with the girl. It was fishy, and regularly Ryoma wouldn't have really cared much, but he had lost. Barely, but he had lost. (That stupid one point…) So that was why on a starlit night when out taking Karupin to the fish market he happened to stumble across the sight of the girl (pretending to be) looking quite lost and decided to investigate. After all, a little interrogation never hurts, right?

"Oh… it's you," the girl had said tauntingly with a sly smirk. Ryoma wasn't the least bit intimidated.

"I want a rematch," he replied bluntly, ignoring Karupin's meows and tugs for him to hurry up. "It won't take long."

"Saa… I guess it won't."

Oh yes. Everyone was going along so finely. It was quick, straight to the point, and effective. So that's how Ryoma ended up in another match with the prodigy he once knew. This time, the younger boy made sure to not underestimate his opponent, making every serve count and every swing make its mark. However, he wasn't the least bit satisfied when he realized the other girl wasn't putting up the least bit of effort to keep up. She was missing easy shots left and right and some she didn't even bother going after at all. It was as if she was taunting and pushing his patience, and by the end of the swift game (6-0 Ryoma), Ryoma was not happy nor was he very amused.

"… You weren't serious," the boy finally said as he took up Karupin in his arms and faced to girl.

"Saa… maybe," Fuji smiled innocently.

"Play seriously," Ryoma demanded. "I want another match."

"Mou… but I'm tired." Fuji laughed.

"…"

"Well, I guess I'll be going now. Thanks for the game, Echizen," Fuji said teasingly as she began to get up. However, Ryoma caught her wrist, his golden eyes narrowing. Fuji halted, turning to the boy.

"Wait. Who are you," Ryoma said. Fuji cracked a smile.

"My… Echizen asking me that?" Fuji said. Ryoma narrowed his eyes deeper as a frown crawled onto his features. And then suddenly, the widened as it hit him like a ton of bricks.

"…Fuji-sempai…!"

* * *

"Ne, what's this, Echizen?" Fuji remarked unhappily as they stepped into Ryoma's room, which was littered with just about anything you could litter from cans of empty Ponta collecting ants to dirty clothes that were forgotten to put into the washing machine to endless pieces of little trinkets and scrap paper. "Not very tidy are we."

"No," Ryoma muttered as he pulled down his cap and proceeded to clear a path by kicking some things aside.

"But I guess it'll have to do," Fuji smiled happily as she flopped onto Ryoma's bed. "Good night, Echizen."

"Fuji-sempai!" Ryoma exclaimed as Karupin slithered around him.

"Now what's the matter, Echizen?" Fuji laughed as she pulled herself to an upright, a finger flying to her cheek in a questioning gesture.

"You can't stay here," Ryoma said definitely as he picked up the cat and frowned. Fuji questioned his menacing stare in the eyes with her own brilliant blue ones. The staring contest only lasted seconds, ending when Ryoma sighed and threw off his jacket.

"Saa… my victory then," Fuji laughed as he picked up a nearby picture frame containing a picture of a three-year-old Ryoma holding a tennis racket.

"No!" Ryoma exclaimed as he lunged at the picture, but the prodigy was too quick for him, immediately putting it out of reach. "Fuji-sempai!"

Fuji just laughed as she tossed the picture frame across the room, sending Ryoma running after it. Taking this to her advantage, Fuji quickly and tactfully swiped a nearby photo album and proceeded to leaf out pages at top speed. By the time Ryoma realized this, a wave of horror washed over the usually calm and uncaring boy as he ran back to his sempai.

"No! Don't-"

"What's all the racket! Can't a guy read in peace!"

The three occupants of the room, Ryoma, Fuji, and Karupin stopped still as they watched a rather agitated middle-aged man emerge in the doorway, waving a swimsuit magazine around. Ryoma sighed.

"Kids these days! They're always so… so… You-! You brought a girl home! Congratulations!" Nanjirou immediately dropped his magazine as he made a beeline to his son and took his hand into his own. "Ryoma my boy! You've finally grown up! And wow! You seem to have good taste too!"

Fuji stared perplexed at the man as he rushed over to her and pulled her up, examining her from head to toes. Fuji felt distinctly uncomfortable under the older man's gaze, and found it very hard to believe that this man was supposedly Ryoma's father. Of course, he knew about Nanjirou's fame as do many people all over the world, but now that he was literally up close and personal, well… it's whole other story.

"Whew! How old are you? What's your name? How did you come to meet my son?" Nanjirou gushed out, all the while not taking his eyes off of Fuji's chest, which greatly disturbed the girl. "What size cup do you wear?"

"Stop harassing her, old man!" Ryoma spoke up for the first time, probably very embarrassed about the whole situation. "And if you had half a mind to watch the news instead of just reading those stupid magazine all day, you'd know she already has a fiancé!"

Nanjirou's eyes widened as his mouth dropped opened. "Ryoma you sly little devil! Seducing her when she already has a guy she's going to marry! What a son I have!"

"No!" Ryoma growled as he pushed his father away from Fuji. "It's nothing like that! She's just a classmate!"

"Who is in your room nine o' clock at night and you're _not_ doing homework!" Nanjirou obsevered. "And the room seems to be in a mess, (Ryoma: _It's not like it isn't always_) and your blankets are all tossed up, (Ryoma:_ It's not like I ever make my bed_) and _she_ was on _your _bed. (Ryoma:_ I don't like where this is going…_) …No… it couldn't be! Ryoma, have you two-"

"OUT! _OUT_!" Ryoma roared as he roughly shoved his father out of his room.

"Remember, my son! Go easy on her! She's probably still-"

SLAM!

"Saa… that was… interesting."******

* * *

"Big news desu! Big news desu!"**

The freshman, quickly after overhearing the news while passing near the principal's office, had immediately taken off in a brisk dash and didn't dare slow down until he was well into the perimeter of the Yamabuki tennis courts. His headband must have fallen down at least eight or nine times, and it was a wonder he hadn't trip. However, his luck abruptly ended once he ran onto the court and his headband fell over his eyes again resulting in him accidentally stumbling on a tennis ball.

"What's the hurry, Dan-kun? After all, the sun is shining and it's a marvelously lucky day and we should all be kicking back and slacking off," a wistful and joking voice sounded as Dan felt himself get pulled up to his feet and his headband pushed out of his eyes.

"I heard that, Sengoku! And there will be no slacking off!" Minami yelled from across the court.

"Kidding, kidding!" Sengoku returned with a grin. Then he turned back to Dan.

"So, Dan-kun, what's the big news?" he asked.

"She- She's here desu!" Dan mustered out between pants. "H-Hyoutei's Atobe-san's fiancée desu!"

"She's here?" Muromachi gasped.

"_She's_ here?" Minami gasped.

"_She's here_!" gasped a random Yamabuki person who immediately got pushed out of the scene.

"It's about time she got here," Sengoku laughed. Who do you think took care of the paperwork?

"What's that bastard doing _here_?" Akutsu scoffed. The Yamabuki regulars blinked.

"What are you doing here?" Nitobe asked.

"Yeah! What?" Kita reinforced.

Akutsu glared at them as he slowly advanced onto the two. Nitobe and Kita were starting to regret themselves voicing their questions as the monster towered above them, completely blocking out the sun. The two stared at Akutsu with fear. Fear of being killed. Really.

"How dare you question me! _ME_! Akutsu! Akutsu Jin!" Akutsu roared in a scary voice as he pointed his pink tennis racket in their faces. Nitobe and Kita whimpered. Damn how they forgot how scary Akutsu could be…

"Now, no need to scare them, _Jin-chan_!" Sengoku said teasingly, giving Akutsu a pat on the back despite the other regular's desperate shakes of their heads, trying to tell him no. "After all-"

"You ($&#(! Do you know who you're talking to!" Akutsu growled as he yanked Sengoku up by the collar, the carrot-head only sheepishly grinning. It's kind of obvious now that Akutsu has been having a bad day. (But since when does he ever have a good one?)

"Hehe… sorry?" Sengoku offered with a happy smile. Akutsu frowned, but nonetheless, shoved the boy out of his view. "Ah… I knew I shouldn't have invited him to practice…"

"Then why did you?" Higashimata asked curiously, though he probably already knew what the answer was going to be.

"Because I was feeling happy and lucky then!"

"…"

* * *

"Class, this is our new transfer student, Fujiko Suzume."

The teacher's voice, however, was drowned out by the uncharacteristic outburst of voices of the students, all throwing their random questions towards Fuji.

"WAH! You're her! You're really her!"

"What are you doing at Yamabuki! Shouldn't you be at Hyoutei or Seigaku?"

"Are you really going to be married to Atobe!"

"Are you really Tezuka's cousin!"

"Do you really already have a kid!"

"When's the wedding!"

Fuji just smiled, but says no word as the class slowly settled down for the day's lesson to begin. For the remainder of the morning, she was bombarded with various notes of all kinds, all asking her to confirm the rumors and some even asking her to have lunch with them and things like that. She was flattered, but slightly disturbed. Honestly, the lesson was interesting; it really was, even though Fuji already knew all of the material. And then there was the little leprechaun who Fuji was sure was ogling her from behind the whole time.

_Saa… This will be fun…_


	13. REALLY Unlucky!

By little leprechaun, as asked by some, I would be referring to Sengoku. He always struck me as that, for odd and strange reasons as it may be. Anyhow, please enjoy this short chapter for which writer's block sort of had me in for.

* * *

Chapter Thirteen: Really Unlucky

* * *

"Hello!"

There was a fifteen-minute break before the next class began, and Fuji was deep into a short novel of hers when a pair of inquisitive blue-green eyes suddenly jolted her from her reading. The girl blinked a few times, genuinely surprised for a first time in a long time, before slowly lowering her book and closing it with a soft thud.

"Oh. Hi," Fuji replied, not really quite sure what to say to the orange-haired teen who had suddenly decided to pop up in front of her. Usually it was she who made the first move in everything, but some people just didn't have the patience, did they?

More blinking took place before Sengoku broke into a goofy grin and started looking at Fuji in a way that really made the girl feel awkward. Really, what was so interesting about her chest anyhow?

"Sengoku!" Muromachi sighed as he came over to haul his love-dazed friend away from the girl. "Do you have a crush on every girl in the whole wide world or something?"

"Yes," Sengoku answered, dead serious and without hesitation. Muromachi twitched. He for one sure didn't want to know what Sengoku's utopia would be. Turning back to Fuji, wearing the love-dazed face again, he said in an almost sighing manner, "What to have lunch with me? And then maybe we could go get coffee after school, and then-"

"Sengoku! Teacher!" Muromachi hissed as he pulled his friend back to his seat and quickly dashing to his own. Indeed, the teacher came in only seconds later.

_Saved by the teacher, ne? Saa… that's unexpected._

Class proceeded without much more disturbance, save the one small note that was shot onto Fuji's desk. Do we even need to ask whom it was from?

_Lunch on the rooftop._

Fuji suppressed a sigh as she pocketed the piece of paper. Well, it's not like she had better things to do, right?

* * *

Lunch was… interesting, but above all, a little weird. As it turned out, all of the Yamabuki players had gathered to have lunch on the rooftop, and that caused quite the havoc, especially when Sengoku showed up with a rather ticked off and very annoyed Akutsu Jin.

"So, you're really Tezuka's cousin and wife-to-be of Atobe?" Sengoku asked with intrigue, picking things off of just about everyone's lunch.

"Saa… I suppose," Fuji replied, smiling, though she did admit it was rather strange for the orange-haired boy to be eating some of her lunch, as well as bits of everyone else's.

_And I thought Seigaku was so upbeat and random… _Thoughts of her experiences at Hyoutei, St. Rudolph, and now Yamabuki flashed through her mind and Fuji couldn't help but sigh at the thought of all the mess. After all, they were still kids, right?

"Oi! What are you doing?" Kita demanded as Sengoku poked as his rice.

"But you make better lunches than I do," Sengoku protested as Kita quickly stowed away his lunch in a safe place.

"Well, it's not my fault you're incapable of cooking," Kita snorted. Fuji blink.

"You all make your own lunches?" she asked.

"It's a mandatory home economy project," Muromachi shrugged as he looked at his own lunch of badly burnt rice and some… other badly burnt stuff too burnt to distinguish. Oh, how delicious.

"But our coach thought it was good idea desu, so everyone in the tennis club now makes their own lunches desu, and the regulars have to eat together desu!" Dan informed. Fuji cringed. She would hate to see that happening at Seigaku. Inui would probably somehow find a way to switch their drinks with his newest edition of his prized Inui Juice.

"Then what about…" Fuji looked at Akutsu, who shot her a menacing glare.

"What are you looking at, huh?" Akutsu sneered. Sengoku took this chance to swipe a few things off of his lunch, which, surprisingly, looked pretty good and actually edible unlike so many of the other's. "It's not like I _want_ to be here!"

"Yeah, Sengoku drags him up here quite often," Minami offered. "And if he doesn't, Dan does."

"Oh, I see," Fuji said pleasantly as Sengoku nicked some more things off of her lunch. Fuji just shook her head and gave up altogether as she placed the whole thing in front of the boy.

"Oh! Lucky! Thank you _Fuji-kun_!" Sengoku exclaimed as he down the whole thing in almost less than a second. Fuji smirked. He knew.

"No need. I'll do whatever I can for my older brother," Fuji replied sweetly.

Silence… then…

"_Brother_!" Minami demanded. "You have a _sister_!"

"What? No I-" Sengoku began only to be cut short by Dan.

"Wah! Sengoku-san! How come you never told us!"

"Me? I-"

"But then who are your real parents?" Kita mused.

"NO! My parents-"

"He's probably adopted," Akutsu snorted.

"I am NOT-"

"Wait, if Sengoku's her sister," Muromachi began, indicating to an innocent looking Fuji, "then that would mean his father would be Fuji Syusuke, and since Fujiko is going to marry Atobe, then that would mean you two are going to be brothers in law and…" Muromachi trailed off as the thought of Sengoku and Atobe walking down the street chatting like best friends. Muromachi shuddered. Now _that_ was awkward, not to mention completely and totally irrelevant.

"That's NOT it! We are NOT related!" Sengoku whined, shaking his head violently.

"Oh, don't deny it," Fuji scolded jokingly, patting Sengoku on the back. "Is it so bad being related to me?"

"No, I mean yes, I mean… _Why_ are you like that?" Sengoku pouted as he pointed to Fuji who just smiled like always. To the regulars, it seemed as if it were just a simple gesture for Fuji to stop teasing her 'brother', but to Fuji, she knew what he was asking, which was the same thing everyone's been asking: _Why are you a girl!_

"Whatever do you mean, my dearest brother?" Fuji said, words coated in poisonous honey. "Are you sad because we're technically only half siblings because your dad is Wakato Hiroshi who mother was with before she met father?"

"What? That doesn't make sense!" Higashimata exclaimed.

"He's right," Nitobe second. "It doesn't make sense, because then both your dads would have to have been zero or one or something!"

"But it does make sense desu!" Dan suddenly interrupted. "Because both of them do have orange hair that they obsess over desu! And Fujiko-san does look a lot like Fuji-san desu!"

"I do not obsess over my hair," Sengoku insisted. "It's natural!"

"How does any of that make sense!" Akutsu roared.

"Well, time wise it doesn't, but now that you brought it up, Dan, they DO share a lot of similar traits, Wakato and Sengoku, and Fujiko and Fuji," Muromachi pointed out.

"We are not related!" Sengoku said once again.

"Yeah, chronologically, it doesn't make sense…"

"But they DO have a lot of things in common."

"Maybe they're from the future or something."

"You mean Sengoku-san's actually and alien desu!"

"Possibly."

"Hey! I'm not an alien!"

"Now that I think about it, there's no way Sengoku's hair can be natural."

"It IS natural! And I'm not an alien!"

"He must be an alien!"

"I am NOT and alien!"

Fuji smiled a small sly smile to herself as she exited stage right.

* * *

"Hey! Wait!"

Fuji turned around, cocking her head slightly to the left in interest as she saw Sengoku rush after her. Here comes another person asking for an answer. Fuji shook her head. If she only knew herself…

"Hello, Sengoku," Fuji greeted politely like any person would have.

"Hello, _Fuji_," Sengoku returned, face in distress, brows arched, and lips in a slight unhappy frown. This was Fuji's first time seeing the normally happy-go-lucky and carefree boy in such a way, and She almost regretted having spun another false tale at lunch… almost.

"You're here to ask why I look like this and about everything else, right?" Fuji asked.

Sengoku slowly nodded. Fuji smiled as she fished around in her bag for that little vile. After a couple seconds of rummaging, she triumphantly held out the tube of glowing liquid to Sengoku. "Care to try?"

Sengoku's eyes narrowed as he tried to figure out if it was poison, toxic, the thing that shall be the downfall of human beings, or all of the above. Then his eyes traveled to the small label on the vile, which read : Magical Inui Juice Remix Deluxe 3.8, Limited Edition Golden Version (then in very, very, _very _miniscule writing: featuring the Magical Chemical 3.8 which has been tested and proven to alter the twenty-third pair of human chromosomes, also known as a change in sex. Effects last for one week.) Sengoku gulped.

"Never mind…" he laughed nervously as another thought struck him. "Wait, are you really going to marry Atobe?"

"Saa… that would be strange, wouldn't it?" Fuji chortled bitterly. "Oh, by the way, I was wondering…"

* * *

"Hey, I can't see! Move your head!"

"Ow! You stepped on my foot! Again!"

"Sor- Hey! That was my ribs you elbowed!"

"Sorry! I can't see!"

"SHH! SHH! Shut up you guys!"

"What are they doing?"

"Having dinner, duh!"

"I know that!"

"Ow! Who keeps stepping on my foot?"

"I said I'm sorry!"

"Um, I don't think this is a good idea desu… The garbage can isn't really a good place to hide desu…"

"No one asked you!"

* * *

Meanwhile, in the restaurant…

"I feel so unlucky!" Sengoku whined as the waitress gave him a strange look before setting down their order.

"Oh, come on," Fuji sighed. "Just think of it as a nice dinner with a friend from whom you stole lunch from."

"Only it's a girl who's suppose to be my 'sister' when she is actually a he," Sengoku pointed out as Fuji shrugged.

"At least then no one will think we're on a date," she added brightly. Sengoku groaned.

"I'm so _unlucky_!"

At least now Sengoku never tried to pick off of other people's plates anymore.

* * *

Six days down, one more to go…

* * *

Yes, this took place on Wednesday, but if you count Friday, it'll be eight days and… I swear, it made sense before… 


	14. The Joys of Womanhood

Excuse the lateness and the brisk nature of this piece as always.

* * *

Chapter Fourteen: The Joys of Womanhood

* * *

Rikkai Dai, Fuji noted, was a very pretty school. Flowers were blooming, birds were chirping, the grass was lush and green, and the school itself was a beauty. And the best part was that the rumors haven't (yet) reached this tranquil school. If for not the fact that nearly everyone had as much personality as a rock, it would have been quite a pleasant place to-

BOOM!

Well, the word 'nearly' doesn't account for 'all', does it?

Fuji, like everyone else in the class, momentarily abandoned their chemical solution as their inquiring heads snapped to a figure looking quite lost and surprised as shards of glass fell to the ground. A sigh could be heard escaping his lab partner's lips, and a disapproving look could be seen radiating off of the less than amused teacher's face. The boy could only sheepishly grin.

"How man times do I have to tell you that sodium and water do not mix!" Yagyuu hissed as Niou hurried himself to pick up the broken pieces of glass.

"They don't," Niou replied with a smirk, tossing shards of glass into the trashcan. "They explode." Yagyuu could only sigh. Thank goodness that it was only a tiny bit else… well, let's not go there.

Fuji cringed as she turned back to her own project. The objective was… what was the objective again? Fuji really wasn't paying much attention as her lab partner was doing nearly everything and didn't seem to give a dandy if Fuji was doing anything or not. The lab had given her a tingling sense of déjà vu, which wasn't very surprising seeing that less than a week ago she had undergone a horrible experience gone wrong in lab much like this one. However, the real reason her mind was not as focused as it should be was due to the constant cramping of her lower abdomen. Fuji had suspected it was probably caused by something she ate that morning, but rarely do these incidents occur, and it was such a pain, both literally and figuratively.

"We're done," Fuji's lab partner called just as the bell sounded for lunch. Fuji muttered a quick thank you before dashing out the door, anxious to do some mingling with selected people.

* * *

Kirihara briskly sauntered down the hall from his sempai's personal lab, pondering on the thought as to why his sempai would create such a horrific thing. (See chapter nine's omake for more reference.) I mean, honestly, what's the use of being able to control the twenty-third pair of human chromosomes anyways? Heck, what _are_ chromosomes anyhow? Kirihara could only guess that they were some kind of thing that determined your gender by the way Yanagi had said 'turn you into a girl'. But who would be stupid enough to drink –BANG— …it…

"Oh, sorry, I…" Kirihara trailed off as he found himself staring at a slightly flustered and surprised Fuji. "Y-YOU!"

"Oh, it's you," Fuji frowned as she picked herself off and placed her hands on her hips in a very 'girlish' fashion. Kirihara could only gape. Now, contrary to have been influenced by endless video games of horror, violence, and bloodshed, Kirihara was actually quite an intelligent boy, and putting two and two together (the first two being his sempai's new formula, and the second two being that he threw it away) he was quickly able to realize just who was standing in front of him, looking very wrong and awkward in a skirt.

"You didn't… you…" Kirihara stammered as sudden footsteps appeared behind the boy.

"Akaya, it's not polite to stare," Yanagi scolded him as he helped the boy up. Kirihara could honestly care less as he pointed a shaky finger at Fuji, who was now smirking with delight.

"S-Sempai…!" Kirihara wailed. Yanagi could only sigh as he made Kirihara stop performing rude gestures at other before looking at the girl that stood in front of him. It was then that Yanagi felt an unusual fluttery feeling inside of him, much like the ones he gets when he had won a match or have just accomplished something massive.

"Success!" Yanagi gasped as he left Kirihara's side and proceeded over to Fuji. "I had thrown away the only remaining sample in hopes that Sadaharu might fish it out and use it in one of his juices, and you must be the subject of his and my experiment!"

Normally Fuji wouldn't have minded such a person who was usually so calm, cool, and collected as Yanagi to be acting so out of character, but for her to be called a 'subject' was just plain insulting to her stature. Not only that, but she was missing lunch, and Fuji liked lunch because it could possibly be a lack of food causing her constant cramping.

"Come, I must present you to my fellow teammates," Yanagi exclaimed as he caught Fuji by the wrist with one hand and Kirihara with the other and lead both of them down the hall in a hasted trot.

"Excuse me?" Fuji asked, bewildered. "You _made_ that… _thing_?"

"Yes, yes I did," Yanagi nodded. Oh, he was so proud of his accomplishment! "Of course, I should be reporting this to the world, but I had yet to learn the true aspects of its effects."

"You mean it does other things than alter people's genders?" Fuji inquired as the three clambered outside.

"Possibly… I'm not sure of the extent of its true potentials, actually," Yanagi admitted sadly. "I would need more test subjects to research on."

Kirihara paled as Yanagi gave him 'a look' and quickly turned away. There was no way he was going to be turned into a girl, _no way_. Then he caught Yanagi looking at Sanada with the same 'look' and nearly died. What was the world coming to?

"Renji, who is she?" Sanada asked suspiciously as the three sat down.

"You don't know?" Kirihara exclaimed.

"Am I suppose to, Akaya?" Sanada inquired. Kirihara opened his mouth to reply, but thought better of it and promptly shut it again with much displeasure.

"This is my aunt's stepchild," Yanagi said, and had they known about the massive Fuji Family Tree, they probably would've been flipping out like everyone else was. However, Rikkai was an uptight school with zero-tolerance towards such a thing such as rumors, so no such 'flipping out' occurred.

"I'm Fujiko Suzume, pleasure to meet all of you," Fuji said politely. She was returned with a murmur of greetings as well.

"You know, you look very familiar," Niou noted as he leaned forward to examine her. "Haven't I seen you before?"

"She's in our class, Niou," Yagyuu offered.

Niou just shrugged as he turned to his lunch, only to find it missing. He blinked twice before his eyes traveled towards his left and landed on the sight of Marui polishing off the last of it.

"What?" the boy pouted. "You couldn't possibly have eaten it all!"

"You're right," Niou replied knowingly. "Because _you_ ate it all!"

* * *

There wasn't much to say about the rest of lunch save that Marui kept swiping everybody's lunch. Actually, most of the 'interesting' things took place after school during tennis practice and a bit beyond that.

"You want to play against Akaya?"

Bored by not haven been able to so much as touch a racket for the past week, Fuji had deliberately invited herself to the Rikkai Dai practice. Of course, Yanagi had insisted she come either way, for he wanted to 'thoroughly study his subject in action in order to analyze the effects of the Magical Chemical 3.8'.

"Yes. Is that acceptable?" Fuji asked in the politest voice she could possibly muster. Sanada was about to reply when Yanagi suddenly appeared behind the boy, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"Oh, I think that would be a wise idea, Genichirou," Yanagi started. "She's a very good player. It would do Akaya good, believe me."

"Well…"

* * *

"Best of one set match, Fujiko to serve."

The Rikkai Dai regulars watched with mild amusement as Fuji gracefully served the ball and Kirihara return it without fail.

"Why is Kirihara playing Yanagi's aunt's stepchild?" Niou asked with an air of interest and mockery. "Is it even safe to let Kirihara play against a girl? What if he ends up-"

"Enough, Niou," Yagyuu hushed him before he could go on. Niou just flashed him a cheeky grin before going back to watching the match quietly like everyone else.

"But why _did_ you let Kirihara play against a girl?" Marui asked, picking off where Niou left. "I mean, what if he accidentally ends up-"

"Enough, Marui," Jackal told him in much the same manner as Yagyuu.

"Why _did_ I agree?" Sanada muttered loud enough so only Yanagi could here. The boy gave a soft smile before answering:

"Enough, Genichirou. Just watch."

* * *

"Hey, wait!"

Fuji half scowled, half smirked as she swiveled around on her heels to see a panting Kirihara desperately trying to catch up to her. It was quite sad, actually, the match that is. They had gotten past three games before her cramps really started acting up again and she had to literally drop her racket and dash out of the court clutching her stomach. Fuji honestly had no idea to the root of the problem, though she sort of hoped it was only minor food poisoning due to the possible 'side effects' of the Magical Chemical 3.8, which so far included extremely icky tasting and gender swapping.

"Why did you take off like that? We're not finished! I wanted to beat you, even if you _are_ a girl!" Kirihara complained as he marched up to her, eyes bloodshot of blazing.

"I don't feel well," Fuji said dryly, completely serious with all honesty, a rarity this past week. "Bye."

The girl turned around to leave again, possibly to a nearby restroom or something, but Kirihara, not having believed a word of it, easily jolted in front of her, blocking her path. Fuji frowned.

"Please get out of my way," Fuji said in a dangerously low voice as her cerulean eyes glared at the boy intensely.

"Let's finish our match first," Kirihara insisted, not backing down or the least intimidated.

"No."

"Yes."

Fuji sighed, squeezing close her eyes as she clenched her fists. "_Move_, or-"

However, right then, something very, very strange and unexpected happened, completely blanking out Fuji. Her eyes opened again, this time in shock as her face paled and her lips began trembling. Kirihara stared at the girl with confusion.

"Hello?" Kirihara asked. "Why are you-"

Those words were never finished as Fuji suddenly let out a small yelp and began tearing down the street, leaving Kirihara standing perplexed at the curb, gazing after her running figure, until he got the good idea to wake up and follow her.

"Hey! Wait! I still want to finish that match!"

"Renji, what happened?"

* * *

"According to my data, the experiment was more of a success than I had originally anticipated."

"… That was Seigaku's Fuji Syusuke, wasn't it?"

"Very good observation skills, Niou."

"Renji, just what did you create?"

"You'll see, Genichirou, you'll all see."

* * *

"Okay, _what_ is wrong with you!" Kirihara shouted from outside of the women's restroom. It was embarrassing, true, but anyone that so much as cast him a look got the evil eye in return. The match was just that much more important.

"I'm fine! Perfectly all right! Nothing is wrong with me!" Fuji snapped back. Kirihara could hear an awful lot of flushing and scrambling around, and he knew that the girl was definitely not all right.

"Can you hurry it up with whatever it is?" Kirihara returned. "I still want to finish. I was in the lead too."

Kirihara awaited an answer from the girl, but it never came, only more flustered flushing and the sound of toilet paper being ripped. The boy was getting shifty and uncomfortable, and his competitive nature has completely been deflated.

"Are you done yet?" He called impatiently.

No reply.

"Hello? Fuji-san?"

Still no reply.

Kirihara sighed exasperatedly. "If you're not coming out, then I'm coming in to drag you out!"

Fuji remained silent still.

Cursing the word and quickly looking around to see if anyone was around, Kirihara muttered more curses as he cautiously pushed the door open and slipped inside. The match was more important, and he'd do anything to finish it, even if it did mean… trespassing in the women's restroom.

"Damn. It's so _clean_!" He muttered. Shaking his head and focusing on the task at hand, (trying to blush to death in the meanwhile) Kirihara quickly scanned the outrageously clean restroom until he found the lone stall that was closed and emitting constant flushing noises from it.

"I can't believe you actually came in here," Fuji laughed bitterly. "You know this is against your school rules, right?"

Kirihara scoffed. "I don't care. All I care is that we finish our match."

"Right, about that…" Fuji trailed off, however, leaving Kirihara hanging. After three seconds of waiting, the boy's thin patience had finally worn down.

"Just what is going on with you! Are you experiencing food poisoning or something? Because I don't hear you throwing up!" he said. Fuji's humorless laughter could be heard returning that statement, but quickly died down.

"Kirihara," Fuji began. Kirihara sighed. So she _finally_ decided to respond.

"What?"

"I… I need you to buy me a sanitary napkin."

"_WHAT_!"


	15. Torment

This is a very… gross and strange little short chapter, but I hope you all enjoy it regardless. And happy birthday to me as well. YAY! I'm such an ecstatic person…

* * *

Chapter Fifteen: Torment

* * *

"You want me to buy you a _what_!" Kirihara screamed. It wasn't just an ordinary scream, it was a really, really, _really_ loud scream (not girly of course) that had effectively repelled several girls that had wanted to enter. 

"A sanitary napkin," Fuji replied bitterly. "You know, it's like an absorbent-"

"Stop! _Please_!" Kirihara wailed. It was embarrassing; this situation was way too embarrassing, not to mention disgusting as well. "I know what it is, but…!"

"Surprising," Fuji remarked sarcastically.

"I refuse!" Kirihara stated forwardly. Fuji could only bitterly laugh. Now she knew why Yumiko always acted so sarcastic around 'that' time of the month.

"Then I suppose we'll never finish our mat-"

However, Fuji was cut short when the door to the girl's restroom swung open and none other than the other Rikkai regulars stood in the doorway, looking at Kirihara with unreadable looks. Well, actually, Niou and Marui were trying to contain their laughter, but failing to do so as they burst out in tears and snickers, pointing at the less than amused and madly blushing Kirihara. Yagyuu and Jackal remained blank, though the slight twitches in their facial features showed some hints of disturbance in their composed selves. Yanagi has a sad smile on his face, being the only one to fully understand the situation. Sanada, however, had the most menacing glare ever imaginable. His arms were crossed, his lips were in a frown, and his voice was definitely not one of those that sounded happy.

"Akaya!" Sanada boomed. "What are you doing in there?"

"Well, I'm- I was- She's- … um…"

"Aka-"

"WAH! Wh-what are all of you _guys_ doing there!"

Immediately, the Rikkai regulars swiveled around in time to see a girl hightail her way down the hallway. Kirihara slapped his forehead. Now he had not only managed to trespass into a women's restroom, but he had also successfully made his sempai's and teammates look like perverted teenagers as well. Kirihara feared the punishment.

* * *

And so while Kirihara was forced about scrubbing every square inch of the tennis court with a measly toothbrush, Marui, Niou, and Yagyuu were hitting the streets under Sanada and Fuji's order to get her some 'much needed things'. 

"Why do _we_ have to do this?" Marui whined as the three got onto a bus. "I mean, shouldn't Yanagi and Jackal be doing this instead?"

"Nah," Niou shrugged. "They'd just give some lame excuse like 'I'm needed here more' or 'You guys are better suited for the job' even though they all want to say 'It'll ruin my perfect reputation and since you guys already have red marks on them, you should be the ones going'."

"Yeah, true," Marui agreed sadly as Yagyuu uncomfortably shifted his glasses. "But then why is Yagyuu here? Wouldn't he be the first to stay behind?"

"Someone had to watch over you two," Yagyuu replied swiftly.

* * *

Marui decided that his life was ending. 

It was nerve-racking, honestly, standing in the middle of the aisle looking at a huge wall of sanitary napkins and among other things. How was a teenage boy like Marui who never paid attention in health class suppose to know what to buy? He would ask for help, but it'd make him look like some freak, and Marui didn't like being thought of as a freak. It wasn't until he realized he'd look even more freakish gawking at sanitary napkins all day than asking for help did he actually, well, asked for help. (Not before making up a random story that would make him look innocent.)

"Um, excuse me, my sister needed some, erm…" Marui trailed off as the store clerk blinked at him before looking at the things next to where the boy was standing.

"Sanitary napkins?" she suggested. Marui blushed and nodded. Oh, the embarrassment of it all! Someone was going to owe him a lot of bubblegum.

"Eh, yeah…" he said. Who knew shopping was so hard?

* * *

Apparently, shopping wasn't all that hard, or at least it wasn't to Yagyuu and Niou. Well, actually, just Niou really because Yagyuu was sort of torn between just fainting on the spot and just calmly going through it while his mind screamed bloody murder. (Of course, he kept this all to himself so he was still Yagyuu on the outside with a personality rivaling that of a rock. …Okay, maybe that of a _painted_ rock, with all it's pretty little colors and patterns, but still a rock.) 

"What's wrong, Yagyuu?" Niou asked innocently, or so it seemed anyhow.

"N-Nothing, nothing," Yagyuu muttered as Niou grabbed him by the wrist and hauled him into the store, the silver bell tingling overhead. Immediately upon entering said store, Yagyuu had to use all his control power over his body to stop blushing, and since it was Yagyuu, it worked out quite well, though it still didn't justify that he was just plain _uncomfortable_ being in a place and situation like this.

"Are you _sure_ you're alright?" Niou asked, slightly paranoid.

"I'm fine, fine," Yagyuu informed him in a very Yagyuu manner.

"Whatever you say, Yagyuu, whatever you say," Niou said sarcastically. Then he gave his double's partner and good friend a push towards one of the employees that worked there, who was currently engrossed in her magazine. "Now use that gentleman charm of yours to get us what we need."

If anyone else had seen him in such a situation, Yagyuu's reputation would've come shattering down around him in forms of laughing Nious.

* * *

"Yanagi, why did you create such a thing?" Fuji bluntly, still in the sanctuary of her stall. Yanagi had taken up the task of keeping an eye on her while Marui, Niou, and Yagyuu went out to get her the necessary things and while Sanada and Jackal supervised Kirihara's 'punishment' to make sure he didn't cheat. (Of course, Yanagi had locked up the bathroom to ensure no intrusions would occur unless they could be confirmed as one of the Rikkai regulars.) 

"I'm not sure, to tell you the truth," Yanagi answered from a top a sink. (He wasn't about to sit on the floor.) "Perhaps it's out of curiosity."

"Did you create any other 'Magical Chemicals'?" Fuji asked, much in the fashion of a little girl listening to an intriguing story told by her grandfather.

"I did," Yanagi confessed. "Quite a lot of them actually."

This surprised Fuji. Well, actually, she shouldn't have been because if there was a 'Magical Chemical 3.8', you could only speculate that there were others, right? "So what are the other ones? And what do they do?"

"Well, I'm not quite sure of all the effects of them yet," Yanagi concluded. "I've kept most of them bottled up now in small amounts. Actually, in truth, this is the only one who's effects I know. The rat I tried it on was the first one that didn't die."

Fuji twitched. Well that was reassuring. Lucky chance that Inui didn't find some other poison? She didn't know. All she knew was that this Yanagi person was scary on court, but god-like off of it.

* * *

"I am never marrying!" Marui declared as he stormed into the girl's bathroom, face flushed and blushing as he threw down the bag that contained the sanitary napkins Fuji had needed. 

"You asked one of the store attendants for help and she asked you what kind you wanted and you just happened to end up picking one that they didn't have there so the attendant phoned the whole store asking and every then ended up staring at you, correct?" Yanagi dictated the events to a stunned Marui.

"H-How did you _know_!" Marui cried as he blushed even more. Yanagi gave a light chuckle as a response. "Th-That's not funny! And it was so confusing! She asked if I wanted the ones with wings or something! Are they supposed to fly?"

"Can you just give them to me?" Fuji asked, slightly exasperated. Marui huffed as he slid the bag under the stall. "Thank you."

It was just then that Niou appeared with an agitated Yagyuu, or as agitated as Yagyuu could get. The trickster had a smirk on his face while his lips sprouted snickers, which could have only meant trouble.

"Oh, come on, no harm done!" Niou insisted as Yagyuu caught him by the wrist to prevent him from hiding behind Yanagi. "I swear I didn't know that her sister worked there!"

"Yes you did!" Yagyuu hissed, but let out a sigh after and composed himself. He shouldn't be like this. He was, after all, suppose to be the levelheaded one of the bunch.

"You went to a store to by women's undergarments, and the store attendant you had Yagyuu asked was actually the sister of one of your classmates, correct?" Yanagi asked Niou again with his awesome perspicacity of the situation.

"Wow, how did you know?" Niou said, letting out a low whistle. Yanagi just smiled his Yanagi-knowing smile.

Fuji sighed, and thus, here, the day at Rikkai comes to a close…

* * *

"Fuji…" 

The voice on the other end was displeased, frustrated, and tired. Fuji wondered what could have driven her captain to be like this. Perhaps something happened? Hmm…

"Tezuka, what's wrong?" Fuji asked obliviously. "I didn't do anything!"

"Fuji, what have you done?" the Seigaku captain said, waving off her last comment.

"What do you mean, Tezuka?" Fuji inquired. "I haven't been-"

BEEP!

"Fuji Syusuke I shall _KILL_ you!" Kirihara screamed before he hung up. This gave Tezuka more than enough reason to suspect that Fuji had indeed been up to something.

"Fuji…" Tezuka repeated.

"… Fine, maybe I did do some things," Fuji admitted bitterly. "But they were beyond my control, Tezuka!"

"Fuji…" Tezuka groaned. Then he sighed. "I suppose you'll be back at Seigaku tomorrow, correct?"

"If that's what's going to happen," Fuji said. "And I'll be back to normal as well I suppose."

"Let's hope that's the case," Tezuka said. "Where are you staying?"

"Well, actually, since everyone at Rikkai have turned a blind eye on me, I was kind of hoping…"

Tezuka did not like where this conversation was going.


	16. KuniChan Once Again

* * *

Chapter Sixteen: Kuni-Chan Once Again

* * *

"Mother, I…"

Tezuka, after much long, hard thought out planning, slowly and warily approached his mother in a strangely stiff manner. The older women immediately turned off the water faucet and wiped her hands on a nearby towel before turning around to face he son with a loving smile, making it all the harder for Tezuka to tell the lie he was about to tell. Damn that Fuji…

"Yes, Kuni-chan?" his mother said soothingly.

"Well, you see…" Tezuka took a deep breath. He would have to do a lot of repenting after this. "Mother, that transfer student we had over a couple nights ago, well…"

"Is she coming over again?" Tezuka's mother said happily as she clasped her hands together in joy and hopefulness. "Dear, that's wonderful! I'll begin making dinner immediately!" Well, that wasn't that hard… "Oh! I'm so happy you've found such a nice and pretty girlfriend!"

Tezuka twitched. Already he could tell that this wasn't going to be a pleasant night…

* * *

"We meet again, Kuni-chan!" Fuji said cheerily as the taller boy gave a grunt in return. Fuji wasn't the least bit phased by this less-than warm welcome. No, in fact, she was in a rather perky mood, despite her untimely and probably very disturbing time of the month. Tezuka, however, was just the opposite of that. (Kuni-chan from anyone else's lips other than his mother's was just embarrassing.)

"Fuji…" he said rather darkly as the girl dumped her things into his arms and proceeded to skip next to him to the doorstep.

"So, who's home? I want to make a good impression," Fuji said giddily as Tezuka opened the door and let the slightly hyperactive girl inside.

"Just my mother and I," Tezuka said in deadpan. "My father and grandfather are visiting relatives in-"

"Oh! It's so nice to see you again!" Tezuka's mother gushed as she raced up to Fuji and cupped her hands around hers. "I'm so happy my son has found such a wonderful girl like you to date!"

"…Eh…"

"Oh, I shouldn't be bothering you two!" Tezuka's mother said as she hurried back into the kitchen. "Dinner's in half an hour! Hope you don't mind, dears!"

"Thank you, mother," Tezuka said respectfully before roughly grabbing Fuji by her wrist and pulling her upstairs into a room. Tezuka ushered her in before turning on the light, revealing a room that was most certainly not his.

"Tezuka, did you do some redecorating?" Fuji said, completely serious as she glanced around the clean and traditional looking room blankly. Tezuka placed a hand on her shoulder and said in a very soft but dangerous tone in her ear:

"You are not staying in my room again, Fuji."

"But Tezuka…" Fuji moaned like a sad little kitten. "Why?"

"You know perfectly well why," Tezuka continued bitterly. "Please don't raid my grandfather's room either."

Fuji gave a small nod before turning on her heels and walking past straight Tezuka, much to the boy's surprise, before skipping down the hall and dashing into his room with an airy:

"You do that, Tezuka!"

Tezuka closed his eyes as a hand automatically found its way to his temple. Softly counting backwards from ten as an attempt to settle himself down, Tezuka waited until 'one' escaped his lips before whirling around and springing after the girl.

"_Fuji_!"

* * *

"Hoi-hoi!"

"Kikumaru, this is Inui," Inui said through his cell phone as he glanced up at Tezuka's room disdainfully. "It's Fuji."

"Huh?"

"Fuji's back," Inui clarified. Eiji could be heard giving off a surprised gasp.

"Really? Where, nya?" he asked excitedly.

"At Tezuka's."

"Eh! What's he- she- eh… Fuji doing there?"

"Want to find out?"

"I don't know, nya…" Eiji said a little shyly. He still remembered the last time the two, with Fuji, had crashed at Tezuka's house, and Eiji had certainly _not_ enjoyed the laps he was ordered to do. …But then again, this chance was really hard to come by…

"Well, if you don't want to," Inui said.

"… Fine! I'll be there soon, nya!"

Inui smirked. Worked like a charm. Eiji was just too easy to talk into things.

* * *

"So, tell me a bit about yourself, Suzume-chan" Tezuka's mother said happily as Fuji civilly sipped at her water. Tezuka sat nearby, occasionally casting Fuji a few glares, much unlike himself.

"Well, to start off, I'm not your son's girlfriend," Fuji stated with an apologetic smile. Even she didn't want to take things that far. "My parents are just out of town today, and my best friend has a lot of siblings, so I didn't want to trouble their family. Fortunately, however, your courteous son here offered me a place to stay for the night. I'm really grateful. Thank you so much."

Tezuka mentally sighed. (He couldn't do that in front f his mother and Fuji.) Fuji never ceased to amaze him. Lies flowed so freely from her forever-smiling lips, and he wondered how a person like Fuji could do that without showing some sort of guilt or anything. …Or maybe it's because Tezuka was so bad at doing such things compared to the prodigy.

"Oh, aren't you an angel?" Tezuka's mother smiled happily as she dabbed at her soup. "Quite charming, isn't she, Kuni-chan?"

"Yes, Mother," Tezuka said with a very forced tone because obviously Fuji Syusuke, eh, _Fujiko Suzume_ wasn't one to be called 'charming'.

He didn't like dinner, not one bit.

* * *

"Mmm! You have the softest pillows, Tezuka," Fuji moaned as she buried her head deeper into Tezuka's fluffy pillows. "I think I'll just stay here tonight."

"Fuji, _no_," Tezuka said simply as he strolled up to her and attempted to separate the girl from where he was suppose to sleep. There was no way he was sleeping on the couch again. His back still remembered the aching from doing so.

"But _Kuni-chan_!" Fuji whined.

"No."

"Tezuka, please?"

"_No_!"

"But-"

BANG! BANG!

A silence fell between the two, and was ended when Tezuka briskly proceeded to the window, opening them outward, letting in a small breeze that made Fuji shiver slightly. Not even bothering to glace around, Tezuka stared promptly downwards, already having some sort or guess about who was there. His suspicion had been proven correct.

"Inui, Kikumaru," he addressed with slight irritation. Eiji gave a happy grin while Inui appeared to be too busy occupying in collecting dirt samples from the Tezuka property. For whatever reason he wanted dirt from around his house, Tezuka could only speculate.

"Hoi-hoi! Where's our Fujiko-chan?" As if on cue, Fuji popped out from behind Tezuka, responding to her friend with a small wave and her usual smile.

"Hello, Eiji," she said sweetly. "Hello, Inui."

"Ah, the effects haven't worn off yet, have they?" Inui observed, pocketing the bottle of dirt as he whipped out his notebook and a pencil, presumably from thin air, and began scrawling in a hand that only he could comprehend. "Echizen said you had been over to his place once during the past week."

"Had he?" Fuji laughed.

"Nya! You should have been there!" Eiji exclaimed. "Inui was forcing Ochibi to spill everything by feeding him with his newest Inui juice! But Ochibi only had time to tell him that one thing before he fainted!"

"Really?" Fuji laughed again while Tezuka faintly twitched. His mother's voice soon floated up into his room:

"Oh! Kuni-chan! Feel free to invite your friends inside, dear!"

* * *

And so eventually, _with_ all the dillydallying and hassle involved, Eiji and Inui were now comfortably seated on Tezuka's room's floor and chair, respectively, talking avidly to Fuji, who was still on Tezuka's bed, and Tezuka, who was grimly leaning against the door.

"So what did you do after Yamabuki?" Eiji asked. Fuji had taken the liberties to tell the two all about her wonderful adventures, which enthralled Eiji to no ends and gave Inui a chance to take obstinate amounts of data on basically everyone involved. Tezuka could care less really.

"I got tossed to Rikkai Dai," Fuji giggled. Eiji gave a surprised gasp as Inui scribbled harder.

"And what happened-"

RING! RING!

"There's a seventy-four percent chance that that is Hyoutei's Atobe," Inui mumbled as Tezuka hastily went to answer his cell phone.

"He-"

"Really, Tezuka, I'm surprised you weren't the one to call me. You should honestly be apologizing for all the things your teammate did. Put a leash on the person if you have to and-"

"Please lower you voice," Tezuka said coolly as he placed the phone on his nightstand. "I'm not the only one listening to this conversation." Indeed, Fuji, Eiji, and Inui could hear the narcissist's voice quite clearly.

"Don't you dare interrupt me, Te-"

BEEP!

"Tezuka-san, this is Fuji Yuuta from St. Rudolph. Mizuki has been acting strange ever since Aniki left, and I think he's now hyperventilating somewhere in Atsushi-sempai's closet. If you could just… I don't know, maybe talk to Aniki, because I'm sure he would deny telling me that-"

BEEP!

"Tezuka! My luck has completely run dry right after Fuji left! I-"

BEEP!

"-Cough- T-Tezuka, this is –cough- Yukimura Seiichi from –cough- Rikkai Dai and -cough- it seems that –cough- my teammates have been –cough- either completely inattentive –cough- during –cough- practice –cough- or mentally –cough- traumatized –cough- after –cough- -cough- -cough-"

"Yukimura, you should be resting."

"No, I'm –cough- alright –cough- Sanada –cough- real-"

BEEP!

"Tezuka! This is Oishi! It seems that Echizen has gotten sicker and is now in the hospital! (Inui: …It looks like I added too much of XXX to the juice… Tezuka: GLARE.) I was wondering if you could get a hold of Inui, because I can't seem to reach-"

"I am just about fed up with all the interruptions! Why is it that every time I try to talk to you, Tezuka, that-"

"Tezuka-san, Mizuki is now reciting poetry in _my_ closet, and it's scar-"

"I'm so _unlucky_! Tell-"

"-Cough- S-sorry –cough- for the –cough- trouble –cough- I-"

"Enough, Yukimura, you should get some rest and-"

"Tezuka! Echizen's turning purple! Please-"

CLICK!

With trembling hands Tezuka had promptly turned off his cell phone. There was a tense silence for a few seconds before the Seigaku captain whirled around in a cloud fury. Eiji whimpered, Inui cringed, and Fuji, as always, just simply smiled.

"_Fix it_! _ALL of it_!"


	17. It's Over, Or Is It

* * *

Chapter Seventeen: It's Over, Or Is It Really?

* * *

Fuji awoke the next morning early, but well rested. She blinked a few times at the bright sun that shone outside the window before the past week's events rushed to her head. Quickly and quietly getting dressed, as not to wake anyone, Fuji was delighted to see that the effects haven't worn off yet. Now she had another day to stir up some fun and havoc.

Somehow, the sound of a giggling Fuji leaving Tezuka's room didn't sound very reassuring. …Especially to one who had been forced to sleep on the couch… again.

* * *

"Saa… I wonder why everyone's staring at us, Tezuka," Fuji asked as the two walked to school. Tezuka resisted the strong urge to just break away and run to school leaving Fuji in his dust, and settled for an exasperated sigh instead. He knew it was dumb question, the one Fuji had asked. Of course everyone would be staring if someone had linked their arm around the Seigaku tennis club captain. Why won't they? Ah… Tezuka could just picture the school newspaper's headline: "Friend or Friendlier? Tezuka Kunimitsu's Secret Love". Maybe they'd believed him about the whole cousin ordeal. Heh… he wished. They'd twist the truth either way.

…Or, at least that's how he hoped it would turn out. Apparently Fuji was more popular than he thought, for every time someone from school caught sight of the female prodigy on their way to school, they would let out a stunned gasp and continue on, muttering in excited tones for the boys, and giggling for the girls. It didn't take long before Tezuka paled and realized the truth: they all knew it was Fuji.

Wonderful… 'Prodigy Cross-Dressing and Clinging to Stoic Captain'. Just _great_.

* * *

"Fuji, kindly explain to us why you are in a girl's uniform rather than a boy's?"

The whole class turned, wide-eyed and questioning at the brunette. Apparently, they too all wanted to know the answer ever since she had merrily made her way into class. If for not the fact that Eiji had somehow managed not to make them cause an uproar, Fuji would've been bombarded with questions and the teacher might've as well had a heart attacked when she walked through the classroom doors. (Might've had something to do with the usually happy-go-lucky Eiji frowning and glaring at everybody as if to warn them off.)

"Saa… well, I'm just trying to explore my feminine side. Is that so wrong? Girls are always complaining about how men don't understand them these days.

A coupled of girls in the glass giggled, and others sighed. Most, however, just stared at her with bewildered look that is impossible to put into words. The teacher, however, just blinked before proceeding on with the day's lecture. Even she knew well enough not to try and comprehend the mind of Fuji Syusuke. Honestly, (s)he shouldn't be in this class. (S)He should be in class one where all the other geniuses are. Just her luck…

* * *

Confrontation with Oishi

* * *

Surprisingly, the first person Fuji had bumped into that school day was Oishi, a flustered and a panicked, dashing towards him with a surprised and stunned look painted on his face. As the boy neared, Fuji gave a smile and a polite nod in acknowledgement. In return, she got a good shake and a long rant in incomprehendable words that were most likely a lecturing scold.

"Fuji! Why are you in a girl's uniform and why did you and Eiji and Inui lie to me the other day and why have you been causing trouble all over the place and why has Echizen been at the hospital at your expense and why-"

"Oishi…"

"Have you been eating well? Have you been brushing your teeth every night? How are you feeling? Inui told me you were on your period! Where were you sleeping? How were you faring? Did anything happen?"

"Oishi…"

"Oh! Fuji!"

Fuji's eyes flickered open and grew unbelievably large as Oishi dropped all his books in the middle of the hallways and drew Fuji into a bone-crushing hug, making the girl drop all her books as well.

"I'm so happy you're _alive_! But what were you doing as a girl anyhow!"

"Eh…"

* * *

Confrontation with Echizen

* * *

"Fuji-sempai!"

Fuji second confrontation was with none other than little boy wonder himself. Ryoma had a slightly agitated look on his face as his brows were arched and his lips in the form of a delicate frown, which seemed to amuse Fuji to no end as the girl had been wondering for quite a bit about Ryoma and his little 'hospital accident'.

"Oh, Echizen," Fuji said casually with a wave. "Are you alright? Several people have told me about your little trip to the hospital."

At this, Ryoma's face turned an unhealthy shade of red, whether from embarrassment of the incident or anger, no one could really tell. Fuji smiled. Ryoma was so easy to read. Pushing his buttons was as easy as counting to ten.

"Fuji-sempai…" he growled as he flushed deeper and his hands scrunched up into fists. "Do you know how much the hospital bills costs! Because of _you_, I was _poisoned_!"

"Saa… I don't really see how it's my fault," Fuji sighed. "If you have a problem, you should go sue Inui."

Ryoma, if possible, turned even redder by this comment, and Fuji couldn't resist a girlish giggle, which somehow Ryoma's mind interpreted as a sadistic snicker. The prodigy then flashed Ryoma and soft smile before patting him on the head and walking away.

"But I'm happy you're alive, Echizen, even if you do someday surpass me and snatch away singles two from me, which you won't, not now anyways."

Ryoma glowered at the retreating figure. "Mada mada dane…"

* * *

Confrontation with Kawamura

* * *

"Um… You dropped your pencil…"

Fuji swung around with gleam as she recognized the voice to belong to none other than Kawamura. The boy was shyly handing her a pencil, but his usual shyness (unless in burning mode that is) was quickly replaced by a look of shock. Apparently, rumors had yet to travel to his ears.

"F-Fuji!"

"Hello, Taka-san," Fuji said sweetly.

"Y-You're… Y-You're…"

"Inui didn't tell you?" Fuji asked, slightly surprised. If Inui hadn't blabbered, Eiji must have.

"That you're cross-dressing and becoming a girl?" Taka said faintly as if he was going to have a heart attack. His family would NEVER accept such behavior.

"…"

* * *

Confrontation with Momoshiro

* * *

"FUJI-SEMPAI!"

"Ah! Hello there Momo."

"FUJI-SEMPAI!"

Fuji couldn't help but laugh at the look on the teen's face, one that was a distortion of confusion, shock, and disbelief. Momoshiro had been one of the ones aside from Inui, Tezuka, Eiji, and Echizen that had been slightly tangled up in Fuji's wonderful little web of chaos, so the realization hit him harder than some of the others such as Taka or Oishi. (Well, actually, scratch out Oishi. He was probably taking it worse than anyone else.)

"Why didn't you tell me! Why didn't you tell us! Why did you say you were Tezuka-buchou's cousin! Why didn't-"

"Whoa! Slow down, Momo, slow down!" Fuji said as she tried to get Momoshiro to stop shaking her shoulders like crazy.

"FUJI-SEMPAI!" And for second time that day, Fuji found herself in a bone-crushing hug, only this one tighter than the other due to Momoshiro's strength. The girl could only try to breathe as she secretly wondered why everyone was so big on hugging her.

_Saa…

* * *

_

Confrontation with Kaidoh

* * *

Now, Kaidoh was probably the only one who had nothing to do with the Fuji case, minding his own business and training menu. However, if you're a close association of Inui Sadaharu, you occasionally hear him mumbling things as he jots down notes in that trusty notebook (or notebooks) of his.

So Kaidoh wasn't nearly as surprised to see a female Fuji Syusuke hopping around school, for the initial shock had already set in quite a while ago. Still, it didn't justify that he was absolutely stunned at how she presented herself to the rest of them. The person certainly wasn't the prodigy Kaidoh knew.

"Fssh…"

"Oh, hello, Kaidoh," Fuji said with a beam. Kaidoh merely adverted his eyes as he never really bothered with girls before.

"Fuji… sempai…" he said slowly, not quite sure of the words that was coming out of his mouth. Unlike the rest of the regulars, Kaidoh was never really big on the whole 'magic' thing. For him, only way to do something was to work hard at it, not through magic.

"That's me, or, rather, was me," Fuji said sheepishly.

Silence…

"Well, class is starting, so I should go now," Fuji said. Unless you were Momoshiro or Inui, it was just impossible to hold a conversation with Kaidoh.

"Fssh…"

* * *

"Nya! One more minute until Fuji turns back to normal!" Kikumaru Eiji gave an earsplitting smile as he automatically, out of habit, clabbered onto the unsuspecting Ryoma, who gave an annoyed grunt as he splattered juice all over the place.

For this special 'occasion' shall we call it, the regulars had all gathered in the clubroom just before practice to witness first hand the amazing transformation Fuji was about to make, or, at least, hoped to remake. For the past seven minutes, Fuji, along with everyone else, had constantly been bothering and nagging Inui all with the same general question. Everyone was anxious.

"Finally," Tezuka muttered loud enough so that only Fuji could hear.

"So! Fuji, are you going to miss being a girl?" Eiji asked innocently.

"Eiji!" Oishi scolded.

"Five," Inui had begun the countdown.

"Saa… probably not," Fuji smiled. "I wouldn't be able to play tennis with you guys then, will I?"

"Four."

"But was it fun, Fuji-sempai?" Momoshiro asked, "I mean, it's not everyday you get a… a gender swap." At this Fuji let out a small giggle.

"Three."

"Ah… I suppose you could say that," Fuji answered. "Though there _was_ one thing I always wanted to do that I didn't get to…"

"Two."

"What was that, Fuji-sempai?" Ryoma asked darkly, as if afraid of the answer.

"One."

Fuji let out another giggle, only this time it was with a dash of maliciousness. "Well, I never got to kiss anyone…"

"Zero."


	18. And All Is Well Hopefully

* * *

Chapter Eighteen: And All Is Well… Hopefully

* * *

So you must all be wondering what ever happened to our dear little Fuji. However, as you must all know, Fuji wasn't the only person that was involved with this whole ordeal. The other schools had their part of it too, and they were a whole lot less pleased with the whole thing than Fuji.

* * *

Of Fudomine

* * *

"And it was _embarrassing_! Do you know what it feels like to have a _girl _return one of my shots! Girls can't even play tennis and-"

"Ehem…"

Kamio immediately snapped out of his ranting to Shinji (though it was usually the other way around) and blushed as he swiveled to face a rather annoyed Tachibana An. He blushed even deeper as he realized that An had heard the entire conversation.

"What were you saying about girls not being able to play tennis?" An asked as she crossed her arms and tapped her foot.

"I-I… well… I didn't mean you, An-chan, I just…" Kamio stuttered. "She… she was just…"

"Oh Kamio you're so dense," An sighed, shaking her head and making Kamio blush even more. "Couldn't you tell?"

"Tell what?"

"Kamio is mentally impaired when he is angry, but all people are mentally impaired when they are angry because their sense of judgment is foggy so they can't really do anything but Kamio is always angry so-"

"…_Boys_ these days…"

* * *

Of Hyoutei

* * *

By now Atobe had calmed most of the rumors, having held a press conference the other day to clean up the misunderstandings. Still, it didn't really help when it came to his team members however, for every time he wasn't looking, he could be sure to hear a snicker from somebody behind his back.

"So that really was Fuji Syusuke, wasn't it?" Oshitari asked wistfully as he and Atobe observed a match between Hiyoshi and Gakuto.

"Yeah," Atobe grunted, preferring never to hear that name ever again. As you can see, the damage was still mending, and having another prodigy around wasn't exactly helping the situation.

"Do you know how he did it?" Oshitari went on as Hiyoshi kept his service game.

"Some chemical thing," Atobe muttered, hoping Oshitari would get the point and change the subject. Oshitari, however, pushed further.

"How wonderful it must be," Oshitari said with a smirk, "to be able to alter genders like that."

"I hope you're not getting any ideas," Atobe said darkly, knowing a scheming face when he sees one.

"Now what possible harm could _I_ do?"

* * *

Of St. Rudolph

* * *

Perhaps worst off of all the schools was St. Rudolph, or more specifically, Mizuki. On the bright side, he had stopped hyperventilating and reciting poetry in people's closets and hasn't been to practice for the whole rest of the week, giving everyone a break. On the dark side, and slightly queer side, well…

"M-Mizuki dane… w-what are you doing dane?"

Yanagisawa had been sent by Akazawa to find their team manager after his third day of absence. Sure, they were enjoying the loosening up and the lack of purple on the courts, but part of them all did miss the flamboyant boy.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" Mizuki snapped back in a rather un-Mizuki-ish way. Yanagisawa could only stare.

"…You've become Fuji obsessed dane…" Actually, staring at the massive pictures of Fuji (Syusuke) and the piles of notebooks all with his name scribbled onto it and other knick-knacks of the sort, Yanagisawa's statement wasn't very exaggerated.

"Of course not!" Mizuki insisted darkly, shooting a glare at the other. "I am merely studying my opponent so one day I shall _crush_ him! Nfufufufu!"

"…Dane…"

* * *

Of Yamabuki

* * *

"So _unlucky_!" Sengoku wailed.

Minami silently swore as the cord ball dropped into his side of the court, effectively winning the set for Sengoku. Apparently, the boy's luck had taken a change for the better and now Sengoku was steamrolling any and everyone going against him.

"For Minami-buchou that is!" Sengoku laughed as Minami twitched.

"Why couldn't he have kept that unlucky streak?" Minami sighed.

* * *

Of Rikkai Dai

* * *

"Everyone is –cough- so slow –cough- on their –cough- follow ups and –cough- serves –cough- -cough- cough-"

"Genichirou, was it really a good idea to have Yukimura here when he has a fever?" Yanagi asked, concerned over his captain and friend's health.

"He insisted," Sanada sighed as he pulled the rim of him cap. "There was little I could do."

Yanagi gave the boy a solemn yet understanding look. He knew all too well that when Yukimura wanted to do something, he did it, and there was just no stopping him. So if it meant the captain observing practice with a packet of medicine and a box of tissues, so be it. Besides, the boy was vastly anxious about the performance of the team as they seemed to be constantly spacing out a lot.

"Yagyuu! You're –cough- two steps too –cough- slow!" Yukimura coughed out as he grabbed another tissue and blew his nose.

"Sorry," Yagyuu apologized as he walked back to his position on the court, being followed by a pair of taunting eyes that belonged to Niou.

"Why –cough- is –cough- everyone so –cough- disturbed?" Yukimura demanded of Yanagi and Sanada.

"Various… reasons," Yanagi answered uncomfortably. Sanada sent him a glare as if to say that it was all his fault, which technically it was.

"-cough- Sanada? –cough-" Yukimura went on. "And I want –cough- the real –cough- truth. -cough-"

Sanada sighed again as he prepared to let the strangest words ever to come from his mouth tumble out. "Well, it's a long story…"

* * *

Of Seigaku

* * *

Recapping from last time…

"Five," Inui had begun the countdown.

"Saa… probably not," Fuji smiled. "I wouldn't be able to play tennis with you guys then, will I?"

"Four."

"But was it fun, Fuji-sempai?" Momoshiro asked, "I mean, it's not everyday you get a… a gender swap." At this Fuji let out a small giggle.

"Three."

"Ah… I suppose you could say that," Fuji answered. "Though there _was_ one thing I always wanted to do that I didn't get to…"

"Two."

"What was that, Fuji-sempai?" Ryoma asked darkly, as if afraid of the answer.

"One."

Fuji let out another giggle, only this time it was with a dash of maliciousness. "Well, I never got to kiss anyone…"

"Zero."

And then… nothing happened.

As more seconds past by, everyone grew from nervous to anxious to right out _scared_ that nothing spectacular was going to take place. Fuji herself seemed rather jumpy as well.

"_Inui_," Fuji hissed as a murderous glint came over her eyes. "Why am I still are girl?"

Inui could only tinker with his glasses as his mind whirled to think up of some means to explain the situation. "Well, actually, Renji and I did some extensive research on the properties of the Magical Chemical 3.8 and the results it yielded were different than those Renji had previously conducted."

"_What_?" Fuji hissed.

"Nya! Does that mean Fuji's going to be a girl for forever!" Eiji gasped as he clutched his head in frustration and disbelief.

"Inui…" Tezuka added darkly.

"No, actually, the experiments that were previously tested on a stray dog by Renji rendered a maximum effect of one week, but it did not correlate to the effects that would be demonstrated on humans so…"

"So?" Momoshiro urged.

"So?" Kawamura said as well.

"Fsshh…"

"So?" Fuji asked in mock politeness. Inui took a deep breath.

"So… Fuji here will remain in this form for another week," Inui concluded, getting ready to run for his life.

Silence…

More silence…

Even _more_ silence…

And then…

"INUI!" Fuji screamed as she advanced rapidly towards the boy.

"B-but Renji and I also managed to create a remedy for the effects! Really! It should work and-"

"_Should work_!"

"No! I mean- what I'm trying to say is that-"

"Wah! Inui nya!"

"W-we tested it! Except-"

"Fsshh…"

"Inui-sempai!"

"Except what!"

"…"

"E-except it just has the side effect that you'd never be able to reproduce so I strongly advise you not to try it and-"

"INUI!"

"…Mada mada dane."

* * *

THE END

* * *

And so concludes the strangest, most twisted and most bizarre piece I have ever written. Ah yes, _wonderful_ ending. If all goes well, I should have some kind of sequel up next year. THANK YOU ALL FOR READING AND REVIEWING! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Years as well! 


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